


All Grown Up

by StarFar



Category: Cats - Andrew Lloyd Webber, Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats - T. S. Eliot
Genre: Aged Down Characters, British English, Childhood Friends, Childhood Memories, Demisexual Character, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Growing Up, Growing Up Together, Happy Ending, M/M, Mr. Mistoffelees is Quaxo (Cats), Pre-Canon, Romance, This is the sweetest thing I've ever writen, just cute wholesome content, no violence at all, or smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-28
Updated: 2020-09-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:48:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 27,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26152924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarFar/pseuds/StarFar
Summary: “Quaxo?”“Hmm?”“How come you don’t just go talk to him?” Plato inquired softly, “You and he used to be friends after all.”Quaxo sighed, “We did. I mean… we’re still friends, just not… close friends.”“What happened?”Quaxo shrugged his dark shoulders, “He grew up. Didn’t want a kitten around cramping his style while he flirted, did he?”Plato thought about that for a moment, “But you’re not a kitten anymore. Couldn’t you try again?”
Relationships: Mr. Mistoffelees/Rum Tum Tugger (Cats), Quaxo/Rum Tum Tugger
Comments: 22
Kudos: 220





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I am continuing my usual trend of not finishing the thing I should finish and getting sidetracked. You're welcome. 
> 
> Quaxo and Mistoffelees are the same cat, but I use Quaxo throughout this. I've also aged down Tugger a bit so they were both kittens at the same. I've basically made Tugger maybe 6 months older then Quaxo.

“You’re staring.”

“Shut up.”

There were giggles from the other young toms.

“It’s ok,” Tumblebrutus said reassuringly, patting him on the shoulder, “we understand. We like looking at him too.”

“Some of us more than others.” George added, glancing meaningfully at Plato who went red and looked down to kick at the dirt between his paws.

“At least his eyes don’t fall out of his head every time he sees Bombalurina.” Quaxo shot back.

Tumble and George laughed loudly as Pouncivil spluttered at him. Plato gave him a grateful look as a commotion broke out on the other side of the clearing.

“What’s going on?” George asked, even though they were in no better position to know then he was.

“Come on,” Tumble declared, jumping down off the tire, “let’s go investigate.”

“No thanks,” Quaxo said, sounding bored, “I’m good.”

“He just wants to stare at Tugger some more,” Pouncivil smirked at him.

Quaxo gave him an unimpressed look as he and George joined Tumblebrutus on the ground.

“I might stay too,” Plato spoke up, “You guys go ahead. Let us know if it’s anything important.”

Tumblebrutus shrugged at them and led the other two toms away as Plato settled down beside Quaxo. Plato was big for his age and always made Quaxo feel rather small, which of course he was, but he was quieter than the other toms as well so Quaxo got along with him a lot easier than the others. Tumble wasn’t so bad but Pounce and George were always on, and Quaxo found that he got exhausted fast when he was around them for prolonged periods of time. Plato seemed to feel the same.

“Quaxo?”

“Hmm?”

“How come you don’t just go talk to him?” Plato inquired, “You and he used to be friends after all.”

Quaxo sighed, “We did. I mean… we’re still friends, just not… close friends.”

“What happened?”

Quaxo shrugged his dark shoulders, “He grew up. Didn’t want a kitten around cramping his style while he flirted, did he?”

Plato thought about that for a moment, “But you’re not a kitten anymore. Couldn’t you go back to being friends?”

Quaxo glanced at him out the corner of his eye, “Probably, but he’s always surrounded by cats and… well you know I don’t like crowds.”

“Except at the ball.”

Quaxo smiled, remembering their first ball the previous month. “Yes, except the ball.”

Plato was staring across the clearing at Tugger now too. The large Maine coon was in the centre of a huddle of queens, lounging on a chest and clearly charming all of them. Tugger glanced up and shot them a wink before turning back to the queens.

Plato went bright red and Quaxo felt rather bad for the other tom who was nowhere near as good at hiding his feelings as Quaxo himself was. With most of Quaxo’s other friends it was hard to tell if they wanted to be Tugger or be with Tugger, but with Plato it was very obvious. Not that Plato would ever try his luck but he’d happily sit with Quaxo and watch the older tom for hours on end. Quaxo would be concerned if it didn’t make him feel so much better about the crush he himself had been harbouring for well over a year now.

* * *

_The tiny black and white kitten glared at his own paws as he tried to repeat what he’d managed to do only moment ago. Frustratingly the feather stayed resolutely in the dirt. No floating, spinning or sparkling to be seen. Quaxo screwed up his face as he huffed. The feather bounced and fluttered over, pushed by Quaxo’s own breath._

_It was all so frustrating. He knew he had magic. Quaxo had seen it often enough. Unfortunately for him it never happened when anyone else was around. He’d tried to tell Jennyanydots one time and she’d just laughed and told him that he had an over active imagination. But Quaxo knew it was true. He did have magic, he just couldn’t seem to control it._

_The other kittens his age, Tumblebrutus, George and Plato were off hunting bugs around the junkyard. Quaxo had hid so they didn’t invite him to join them. It wasn’t that he didn’t like them, it was just that he felt awkward in large groups and frankly wasn’t a fan of insects, arachnid or anything else that had more than four legs, or worse none at all._

_Quaxo refocused on the feather, trying to will it into flight. Just when Quaxo was about ready to shred it out of frustration something large and hair collided with him._

_“What in Heaviside!” Quaxo yelped as he blinked up to find the Rum Tum Tugger sprawling in the dirt beside him, “What are you-”_

_A paw over his mouth silenced him as the larger tom grabbed him and pulled him behind the bookshelf he’d formerly been sitting on. Tugger kept the paw over Quaxo’s mouth even as he put his own back to the wood and glanced suspiciously around the shelves._

_Quaxo, who was being held back against his chest and stomach, had little option but to remain silent as Munkustrap’s voice erupted behind them. Tugger flattened the two of them against the wood even further as the angry footsteps faded. Eventually it faded off a bit and Tugger let out a large breath. Quaxo reached up to pull the paw away from his mouth._

_“What in Everlasting Cat’s name are you doing?” He squeaked at the bigger tom who was still sneaking looked around the side of the bookcase._

_The Rum Tum Tugger was technically still a kitten himself, but he was a very large kitten and too old to pay the kits Quaxo’s age much attention._

_“Hiding from him, obviously.”_

_“Well could you maybe leave me out of it next time?” Quaxo cross his arms over his chest defensively. He didn’t like being taken by surprise, and he liked being manhandled even less._

_“Sorry, I…” Tugger looked at him finally, going completely silent as his eyes widened, “Look at you!”_

_“What?” Quaxo asked self-consciously, glancing down at himself in alarm. “Oh…” Quaxo’s fur was alight, sparkling in the shadow of the bookshelf._

_“What is it?” Tugger asked, sticking in nose out to investigate, “Is it the glitter Jenny uses for crafting?”_

_Quaxo flushed in embarrassment, “No, it…”_

_Tugger looked up from his coat to his face, “It’s what?”_

_“I think…” Quaxo bounced nervously on his toes, “I think I have some magic.”_

_Tugger’s eyes grew impossibly wider. “Magic?”_

_“Not much!” Quaxo said quickly, “But a little. Every now and then I move something without touching it or know something is going to happen before it does. I can’t control it though, and none of the adults believe me.”_

_“Pfft what would they know?” Tugger huffed, wriggling forward to poke at Quaxo’s fur, “Do you think you could learn to control it?”_

_Quaxo shrugged, still looking at the ground, “I don’t know. I’ve been trying. Maybe with one of the older cat’s help-”_

_"No!”_

_Quaxo looked up at Tugger in alarm._

_“No,” Tugger said more calmly, “No let’s figure this out ourselves. Besides the only other magic cats are Dad and Macavity and Dad’s always busy and Maca is… well he’s not always very nice. Besides, you don’t need them. You’ve got me.” Tugger grinned widely at him._

_Quaxo felt a little awkward, not knowing what Tugger could possible mean by all that._

_“And just think of all the mischief we’ll be able to get up to because none of them know about your magic?”_

* * *

Quaxo waddled awkwardly as he dragged the large rat he’d managed to catch into the clearing. He used magic to carry it up from the stream but as soon as he came within sight of the other cats he’d gone back to transporting it the traditional way. He didn’t want to alarm anyone, even if it really was rather too big for him.

Quaxo had stopped using his magic in public after Macavity and Grizzabella’s banishment. He didn’t like the attention it drew to him, or the suspicious looks the other cats gave him when they caught him at it. So he’d stopped. Most of them still knew about his magic of course, but it seemed that they forgot about it pretty quickly when he wasn’t waving it under their noses. Quaxo would much rather be ignored then viewed with suspicion because of his abilities.

Quaxo continued to drag the rat through the dirt and towards the old rusted out cat. The car was his favourite spot in the colder months. The metal warmed up nicely in the heat and it got sun all the way through till late afternoon so it was the perfect spot to get warm. Unfortunately a lot of the other cats seemed to have the same idea and it was rare that it was unoccupied.

Today however, today it was. Quaxo just had to figure out how to get the oversized rat up and onto the roof where he could lay down and warm up a bit. Without using his magic.

Maybe it’d be easier to carry it up and onto the tire first and then across? There were steps up to the tire, so he could pull it up one at a time rather than attempting to jump up onto the boot and likely being pulled off balance by the dead rodent.

“Need help there little one?”

Quaxo jumped, attempted to spin, only to get the rat tangled between his legs and ended up sprawling in the dirt.

Tugger laughed loudly, one paw slapped to his heaving chest and head thrown back. “I’ll take that as a yes!”

Quaxo glared at him, ignoring the paw which was offered to help him up. Instead he clambered back to his feet, brushing himself off in annoyance. He hated embarrassment, it was basically his least favourite emotion, but being embarrassed in front of Tugger was oh so much worse.

“Here,” Tugger said, moving to pick up the rat out of the dirt, “let me help, before you hurt yourself.”

“I wouldn’t have needed the help if you hadn’t snuck up on me,” Quaxo snapped, his nerves making him short, “now both I and my lunch are covered in dust.”

“I’m pretty sure your lunch was already covered in dust before I showed up,” Tugger responded with a grin, “which shows that you most definitely did need help before I showed up. How exactly where you planning on getting it up there?”

Quaxo shrugged, “I would have managed.”

“Well now you don’t have to.” Tugger replied promptly, jumping up on to the boot and taking the rat with him. “Come on.”

Quaxo sighed before following the older tom up. Tugger was settling himself on the roof with his back to the sun as Quaxo joined him. It certainly looked like Tugger was planning on hanging around for a while.

“Don’t you have admirers to entertain or something?”

Tugger gave him a lazy grin. “Well that’s the thing about admirers, you’ve got to leave them wanting more. If they can have you whenever they want you they get complacent and that’s really no fun at all. Besides, this rat is far too big for you on your own.”

Quaxo spluttered indignantly. “What so now you’re going to steal my lunch too?”

“I was thinking more along the lines of sharing,” Tugger replied, completely unfazed by Quaxo’s reaction. “Don’t want good food to go to waste do we?” Tugger didn’t wait for a reply, instead just going straight to peeling the dusty skin off the rat.

At least Tugger was a neat eater, Quaxo thought as he sighed and crouched down beside Tugger. Pouncivil would have shredded it so there was no chance of getting a good bit of meat without at least a couple of mouthful of skin and fur.

Tugger was humming absently as he worked and pretty quickly Quaxo’s annoyance faded to a mild agitation at having the big tom so close. It had been a long time since he’d been alone with Tugger. It was rare that Tugger was alone full stop. Ever since he’d grown into his gangly limbs and oversized feet he was always being swarmed by queens and toms alike. Tugger never showed a lot of interest in return, just enough to keep them coming back and he very clearly like the attention.

“So I saw you and Plato the other day,” Tugger said suddenly, “Anything going on there?”

“What?” Quaxo gaped at him in confusion, “What do you mean ‘going on’?”

“I mean, he’s a good looking tom. You’re a good looking tom. Figure it out.”

“How do… I don’t… Why would you…?”

Tugger chuckled, “Alright calm down. I was just asking. No need to get all flustered. It’s always been obvious you weren’t into queens, and Plato’s the quite sort that I thought you might be into.”

“What makes you think that?” Quaxo asked, desperately buying for time.

“Well just that you don’t seem to like the louder cats too much.” Tugger shrugged as he discarded a bone. “Or crowds. So it would make sense that you’d go for one of the quiet ones.”

Quaxo rolled his eyes, trying to hiding how uncomfortable this topic made him. “What, so we could just be awkward together?”

Tugger grinned at him. “Exactly.”

“Well I’m sorry to break it to you but I don’t have a thing for Plato.”

“No?” Tugger hummed, “Well that’s a shame. I’m sure he’ll grown into those legs of his if that’s any help.”

“It’s not.”

“Oh well,” Tugger shrugged, “Anyone else catching your eye?”

“Pfft, no.” Quaxo shook his head, confused as to why Tugger was asking him this.

“Really? No one at all?”

Quaxo went still, fear creeping in. Could it be possible that Quaxo wasn’t as good at hiding his feelings for the older tom after all? Maybe George or Pouncivil had let something slip. George was particularly bad at keeping secrets after all.

“Come on, good looking, polite, tom like you must have at least a few other cats interested.”

Quaxo swallowed and shook his head silently.

“Really?”

Another shake.

“Well, guess that proved that most of the tribe are idiots.” Tugger mumbled before suddenly standing up, “That’s a shame, but I’m sure someone will come along that you’ll like. At your age probably more than one someone.” Tugger turned and slide down onto the boot and then the ground.

“Wait!” Quaxo called, “Did you really just come over here to steal half my dinner and to ask me that?”

Tugger shrugged with an easy grin. “What can I say? I’m a curious beast.”

* * *

_Quaxo giggled at the look of complete confusion on Skimbleshanks’ face. He could feel Tugger doing the same from his spot just behind him. Quaxo slowly started backing away as Skimbleshanks stood up to go in search of the missing hip flask._

_“We have to do Jenny next,” Tugger whispered as they scrambled away, “she should be up by now. Or Munk! He’d absolutely loose it!”_

_“Can we do it with some food this time?” Quaxo asked as he turned to follow Tugger around the junkyard. “I’m starving.”_

_“Maybe,” Tugger said thoughtfully, “let’s see if anyone coming in from hunting. Maybe we can pull the same trick with their lunch.”_

_Quaxo grinned widely as he trotted after the larger cat, happy in the knowledge that he was about to get fed. Of course he could have easily gone back to the nursery and gotten a feed there but he wasn’t ready to leave Tugger for the day quite yet and he didn’t like feeding from the queen’s in front of him, it made him feel like such a kit. Besides he’s eaten solid food a few times before and quite liked it so it wasn’t like he was going to have to force it down._

_Tugger stopped under a ledge near the edge of the meadow leading down to the river where most of the cats went to hunt._

_“We’ll just have to wait until one of them brings something in and then hope they put it down long enough for you to do your thing.” Tugger stated, hunkering down to watch._

_Quaxo sat beside him, almost on the same level now that Tugger was crouched. “And if they don’t put it down?”_

_“Then we’ll have to wait for someone else and try it on them.”_

_“What if they don’t put it down either?”_

_Tugger turned to look at Quaxo who stared back with wide innocent eyes. “Then I guess I’ll catch something for you. Happy?”_

_Quaxo gave a pleased grin and an enthusiastic nod, happy in the knowledge that he was going to get fed either way. He settled down to wait, glad that they were in the shade as it was quite a warm day though it was still a moon away from high summer._

_A short while later, just as Quaxo was nodding off, Tugger smack him. “She’s coming!”_

_Quaxo blinked, shook his head, before trying to focus on where Tugger was looking. Jellylorum was trotting back towards the junkyard, carrying a dead rabbit and rat._

_“What’s she planning on doing with those?” Tugger asked quietly, “She can’t possibly intend to eat both.”_

_“Probably taking one to Jenny,” Quaxo replied, hopping up to follow the older tom, “what with her being so… fat.”_

_“Pregnant Quaxo, she’s pregnant.” Tugger shook his head, “That’s why she’s fat, because she’s carrying kittens.”_

_Quaxo shrugged, “Yes, that’s the word I was looking for. It’s got to be hard to hunt when you’re that… huge.”_

_Tugger gave a snort of laughter as the two of them crept after the queen who did indeed seem to be heading towards the nursery. Thankfully Jenny was sitting outside with Munkustrap, it would have been a lot harder for Quaxo to float the food away if they’d been inside. Jennyanydots seemed to be teaching Munkustrap to do something involving a ball of yarn. Quaxo couldn’t think of anything worth doing with yarn beside chasing it around the yard, but the adult cats were all a bit strange and never seemed to want to do anything fun. He hoped Tugger didn’t get like that when he was older._

_Tugger put an arm out to stop him before ducking behind a broken piece of furniture and pulling Quaxo with him. Tugger peaked around the corner and Quaxo quickly crept forward to do the same._

_“Ok, so this is going to be difficult,” Tugger hummed thoughtfully, “that’s two more pairs of eyes then you’re used to dealing with.”_

_Jenny said something to Jelly as she sat down in front of them, putting down the rabbit and rat._

_“I’m going to go for the rat.” Quaxo said firmly, “I’ve never moved anything as big as that rabbit and now doesn’t seem like a good time to try.”_

_“Fair call.”_

_Quaxo closed his eyes as he called up the magic, still crouched on the ground with Tugger leaning over him to see around the headboard. His paws quickly stared to sparkle and Quaxo lent back a little further so they were out of the three adults line of sight._

_“Quaxo now!” Tugger said suddenly, “While they’re distracted.”_

_Quaxo opened his eyes to find the two queens leaning over to examine something Munkustrap had done with his wool. Quaxo quickly focused on the dead rat, willing it up and out of the dirt and towards them. It vibrated slightly as it slowly drifted towards them. Tugger’s eyes sparkled as he watched._

_Quaxo had gotten pretty good at this in the recent days by practising with Tugger. Just today they’d already carried away George’s favourite ball, Asparagus’ book and then Skimbleshanks’ hip flask. They’d left all of them where they’d find them later of course, they weren’t outright stealing things. Well Quaxo supposed they were outright stealing this rat but usually they just moved things so they could watching whoever it was get very confused when it wasn’t there moments after they’d put it down._

_The rat floated around the corner and straight into Tugger’s waiting paws._

_“Yes!” Tugger exclaimed, “That was awesome!”_

_“We should go,” Quaxo answered, already backing away, “before they notice.”_

_“Where’s the fun in that?” Tugger asked, with a cocky grin, “I want to see their faces.”_

_“Tugger!” Quaxo hissed as the older tom peaked back around the corner._

_“AHHHH!” Tugger wheeled backwards, stumbling and landing on his arse._

_“Munk, I think we found our rat thief.” Jelly’s voice sounded from out of sight._

_Quaxo stared at the Maine coon with wide eyes, rooted to the spot like his paws were made of lead._

_“Ah… hello Aunty Jelly,” Tugger said awkwardly, “nice day isn’t it?”_

_Jelly made an unimpressed noise as Tugger shot Quaxo a look and tried to wave him away._

_“Munk?” Jelly called again, “You want to deal with this one?”_

_The rat they had stolen was still clutched in Tugger’s paws, and they clearly hadn’t seen Quaxo yet, but the small tom couldn’t bring himself to move from his spot, despite Tugger’s clear indication for him to hide. It wasn’t so much that Quaxo didn’t want to let Tugger take the blame, or that he was being brave, he just physically couldn’t force his body to obey._

_Tugger scrambled to his paws, crawling forward and out of sight, probably so the adults wouldn’t walk up to him and spot Quaxo still crouched on the ground behind the piece of furniture._

_“Tugger…” Munkustrap’s voice sounded tired, “I should have known.”_

_“Hello big brother, how are you this fine day?” Tugger asked back._

_Quaxo could easily picture the innocent grin on his face._

_“I was doing well, right up until my little brother decided to steal Jenny’s lunch, right out from under our noses no less.” Munkustrap replied calmly._

_“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”_

_“You’re literally holding the rat, Tugger.”_

_“What? This?” Tugger asked, holding up the dead rodent. “I caught this myself. Had to feed…”_

_“Feed who?” Munkustrap asked in suspicion._

_“Myself,” Tugger said quickly, “had to feed myself.”_

_There was a long pause before Munkustrap sighed. “Quaxo? Why don’t you come out here? You’re not in trouble I promise.”_

_Quaxo crept forward, his head poking out from behind the weathered wood of the broken headboard._

_“There you are.” The silver tabby sighed, “I shouldn’t be surprised that Tugger here is teaching you bad habits. If you were hungry you should have just gone back to the nursery.”_

_“I did it. It was me, not Tugger.”_

_“Quaxo!” Tugger exclaimed, leaping to his feet and putting himself between Quaxo and his brother. “Don’t listen to him. He just doesn’t want me to get in trouble.”_

_“I am not!” Quaxo exclaimed, trying to push his way past the much bigger tom._

_Munkustrap’s eyes narrowed as he looked between them. Jelly was standing not far away with one paw resting on the very rotund Jennyanydots’ arm._

_“I’m rather more inclined to believe Quaxo then you right now Tugger,” Munkustrap said eventually, “though you are the one holding the rat.”_

_“Exactly!” Tugger said quickly, pushing Quaxo back with one paw, “How else would I have got hold of it?”_

_“Though how you could have grabbed it without any of us seeing I have no idea,” Munkustrap rubbed at his temples. “Quaxo’s rather a lot smaller, so I suppose we might have just missed him sneaking up on us, he is rather tiny.”_

_“Hey!” Quaxo squeaked in indignation._

_“He’s so tiny he’d have trouble just lifting this rat.” Tugger insisted, still using one paw to hold Quaxo back. “It’s almost as big as- Ow!” Tugger jumped back, shaking his now smoking paw._

_Quaxo glared at him, too annoyed to feel too badly about zapping him. When he looked up to find the three adults staring at him in shock however he did begin to feel a little guilty about it._

_“Sorry.” He mumbled, looking down at the dirt between his paws._

_A smoking paw landed on his should a moment later and he looked up to find Tugger standing beside him. “He’s just a kit, and it was my idea. It’s not his fault.”_

_Munkustrap dragged a paw down over his face. “I suppose I should be gratefully to you Quaxo, for forcing my little brother to take some responsibility. How long have you known you had magic?”_

_Quaxo shrugged, “A while. No one would believe me though.”_

_“He told me,” Jenny spoke up, waddling forward, “I thought it was just an over active imagination. I’m sorry for not believing you kit.”_

_Munkustrap sighed and nodded. “Well I guess you’ll have to be trained.”_

_“Not Maca-”_

_“No, not by Macavity,” Munkustrap said quickly, cutting his little brother off. “I’ll mention it to father next time he’s here. Until then, no more using your powers to steal things. Ok?”_

_Quaxo gave a small nod, trying to be subtle as he stepped sideways into Tugger._

_“And you,” he said turning to Tugger, “no more encouraging him to break the rules. We’ve got enough magical mayhem to deal with already. Now how about you give the rat back to Jenny and go catch your own dinner. Quaxo can go back to the nursery for a feed.”_

_“I can catch something for both of us.” Tugger suggested quickly as he handed the rat to Jennyanydots who took it with a small smile._

_“No,” Munkustrap replied firmly, “you both need time to think about what you’ve done, and he’s hardly old enough to be onto solid food anyway. He’ll go back to the nursery to eat. Off you go, both of you, scram.”_

* * *

Quaxo slowly started backing away. Neither of the two other cats so much as glanced at him. Of course both of them were shyly looking at the ground so that wasn’t all that surprising. Quaxo kept backing up, walking on all four paws to prevent from disturbing any loose gravel or bits of rubbish. He reached the back of the stove and quickly stepped sideways so he was tucked in behind it.

Victoria had come up to him and Plato almost half an hour ago. Since then Quaxo had been standing there awkwardly while the two of them attempted to flirt. Flirt in the most awkward, clumsy way possible. It had involved a lot of avoided eye contact and second hand embarrassment on Quaxo’s part. He had very seriously considered using his magic to disappear himself but really what he wanted was for the earth to open up and swallow him.

Now that he was out of sight he lent his forehead against the back of the stove and took a deep breath.

“Escaped did we?”

Quaxo spun, staring around himself frantically.

“Up here.”

Quaxo looked up, only to find Tugger lying atop a pile of junk nearby. He was far enough away that he likely couldn’t have heard what was being said but clearly would have seen the whole debacle unfold. Quaxo rolled his eyes and walked over to the bottom of the stack.

“Didn’t consider coming and rescuing me at all?” He asked as he started to awkwardly clamber up the pile.

“Well see, it was just so enjoyable to watch.” Tugger smirked at him. “And besides, you generally never took nicely to me saving you.”

“Excuse me!” Quaxo puffed, as he slowly dragged himself up a mattress leaning against Tugger’s perch. “I have always been completely gracious and appreciative of any service rendered.”

“Hmmm.” Tugger lent over the side to look down at him cynically. “Yeah sure you have. Except if you thought it made you look emotional, or silly, or young, or pretty much anything which could potentially make you seem anything but purely capable of doing anything and everything any other cat could do.”

Quaxo narrowed his eyes at the tom as he continued his slow accent up the stack of garbage. His claws kept getting stuck in the mattress forcing him to go back down to unhook them. It made his progress very slow.

“Take now for example,” Tugger continued, head tilted to one side thoughtfully, “I could easily help you up but of course then you’d assume that I must think you couldn’t do it yourself. Which is stupid of course. I know you’ll get up here eventually but it’d be so much faster if you just asked for help. But of course you never would. So instead I’m just going to lay here and watch you struggle.”

Quaxo’s eyes became slits as he glared up at him. “Yeah ok, thanks for the psych analysis.” 

“You’re welcome.”

Quaxo growled in annoyance and kept on. He reached the top of the mattress but then couldn’t find any way up the last two feet. He didn’t have the sort of footing he’d need to jump, and besides that he wasn’t sure the stack was solid enough to take him landing on it. There were accidents all the time in the junkyard caused by unstable bits of furniture and the likes toppling over during some kitten’s adventure. Quaxo didn’t want to cause another collapse.

Quaxo looked up to gage the distance only to find Tugger watching him with raised eyebrows. “What?”

Tugger just grinned and shook his head. “I didn’t say anything.”

Quaxo grumbled before looking off to the side to see if there was anyway way up by the next pile over. It was even more precariously balanced then this one. He bit his lip as he considered just using magic.

“Quaxo?”

Quaxo grunted in response.

“Just ask for help.”

“No.”

“There’s not one else to see but me.”

Quaxo ground his teeth together.

“It’d take all of two seconds.”

The tuxedo tom growled.

“And then we could both pretend you got up by yourself.”

Quaxo sunk his claws into the end of the mattress.

“The longer you take to get up here and more likely it is that someone else will come along and see you struggling.”

“Fine!” Quaxo snapped.

Tugger blinked at him in amusement. “Go on then.”

“What? I thought you were going to help.”

“I thought you were going to ask.”

Quaxo hissed at him which only made Tugger grin wider.

“I’m not helping until you ask.”

“I hate you.”

“Naw, love you too, little one.”

Quaxo bristled at the nick name Tugger had used for him when he was a tiny kitten. He used his frustration to block out the first bit of his sentence so he didn’t have to think about it too much.

“Come on Quaxo.” Tugger purred. “Anyone could come along at any moment.”

“Fine.” Quaxo snapped. “Tugger, could you help me up?”

“I didn’t hear a please in there anywhere.”

“Please.” Quaxo hissed.

“Now put the please into the actual sentence.”

“Tugger I swear, if you want your mane intact you’ll help me up right this second or else I’ll-”

“Fine.”

Next thing he knew there were strong jaws grabbing him by the scruff of the neck and easily lifting him up the last couple of feet. Quaxo blink in surprise at how quickly it was over.

“See?” Tugger asked after placing him down easily on what appeared to be the back of some large piece of furniture. “Now was that really so bad?”

“Oh yes, because it’s not like you weren’t trying to make it as bad as possible.”

Tugger shrugged and rolled onto his back before stretching so his stomach was arched into the air. “It’s just that I know how much you dislike being condescended to. So I wasn’t going to help unless you asked.”

“Oh yes,” Quaxo spat, trying not to let his eyes linger on Tugger’s body, “you were definitely just doing that so I didn’t feel patronised.”

“Ok, so maybe I was trying to make a point,” Tugger said slowly, “but you were the one who insisted on coming up here. You could have just as easily walked away.”

Quaxo opened and closed his mouth a couple of times, not entirely sure why he hadn’t done just that. “And what point exactly where you trying to make?” Quaxo finally settled on.

Tugger looked at him sideways, face strangle sincere. “That you don’t have to do everything yourself. That it’s ok to need help, or to ask for it even if you don’t really need it. Remember when I dragged you out of the stream that time? You probably didn’t think you needed help that time either.”

Quaxo rolled his eyes as he finally flopped down next to the bigger cat. “I was bloody drowning. I couldn’t have asked for help even if I’d wanted in.”

“Good thing I didn’t wait then.”

“You know I could have just used magic to get up here.”

Tugger glanced at him, before rolling onto his side to face him and propping his head up on one hand. “Why didn’t you?”

Quaxo shrugged, trying not to look at the way Tugger’s hip jutted out, which Quaxo assumed was the entire reason Tugger had laid like that. “I don’t know…”

Tugger raised his eyebrows at him. “Don’t you?”

He huffed. “Fine. Maybe I just wanted to prove that I was just as capable of doing it the normal way as everyone else.”

“Why though?” Tugger asked, frowning at him. “Not everyone can do everything. Why’s it always got to be a competition with you?”

“Because.”

“Because why?”

Quaxo let out a long sigh. “Because I was always the smallest. Always the littlest that everyone else felt the need to baby. Even you did it at times. And then I was always in the way or getting left behind. You only had to rescue me from that stream because you’d forgotten I was there and run off and I was too small to keep up. I shouldn’t have been out there at that age without supervision anyway. I could have been carried off by a bloody hawk or something.”

“You don’t think I felt bad about that?” Tugger asked, “I hovered around you for weeks afterwards because I was so scared of something else like that happening. I knew it was my fault.”

Quaxo looked up at him, now feeling bad that he’d made Tugger feel bad. “That wasn’t my point.”

“What was your point?”

“That I’ve always struggled to keep up with everyone else.” Quaxo sighed again. “I’ve always needed other people to do things for me. So sometimes I just want to be able to do it myself.”

Tugger stared at him, “But you can do it yourself, with magic. You can do all kinds of things that none of us can do. No matter how big or fast or strong we are. We’ll never be able to do what you can. So it’s ok if you can’t do everything we can. That’s only fair.”

Quaxo shrugged, not meeting his eye. “I know that. At least… logically I know that. Doesn’t stop me from wanting to be able to keep up though. Especially because no one likes me using my magic around them now anyway.”

Quaxo overbalanced as Tugger head-butted him gently. If the big tom hadn’t grabbed him he likely would have tumbled off the pile. Quaxo stared at him in exasperation but Tugger just gave him an innocent look and tried again, this time a little more gently so he could manage a nuzzle without knocking him over.

“Screw what everyone else thinks,” Tugger said, “you don’t have to cater to their overactive imaginations, or their prejudices.”

“I’m not,” Quaxo said quickly. “I’m just… I don’t want them to feel uncomfortable. Many of them are still traumatised. Seeing my magic just brings it all back up again. I don’t want them to be in pain. And if that means having to struggle along,” Quaxo shrugged, “it doesn’t seem like such a big price. Besides, I’m perfectly-”

“Capable. Yeah I know.”

Quaxo gave him an unimpressed look.

“I still think my point is valid.” Tugger insisted. “It’s ok to ask for help sometimes. Even if it’s just so you can do something quicker or easier then you could do it by yourself. It’s just practical.”

Quaxo shrugged. “I never really had someone there to help most of the time. I mean logically I know lots of cat would have helped when I was little. But I didn’t have anyone who was obliged to. You know?”

“Rubbish, all of the adults would have felt obliged to help if you’d asked.” Tugger scoffed at him. “And I certainly would have.”

“That’s not the same and you know it.”

Tugger sighed before grabbing him by one arm and pulling him in closer so he could wash over his ears. “Yeah I know. But… look just ask ok? In future if you need something, or if some help would make something easier, just come and find me. I promise I won’t make a big deal out of it. We can even keep it from everyone else. Whatever makes you more comfortable. Just ask. Kay?”

Quaxo frowned as Tugger kept at his ears, as if he was a kit all over again. He didn’t really know why Tugger was suddenly make such a big deal out of all this. They hadn’t really been proper friends in almost a year. Not since Tugger suddenly became the most wanted tom in the junkyard and Quaxo had realised that he’d never be able to measure up to all that.

“Kay?” Tugger prompted when he didn’t answer straight away.

“Fine.”

Tugger pulled back to narrow his eyes at him. “Do you actually mean that or are you just saying it so I’ll let it go.”

Quaxo tried really hard not to look guilty, and if it was anyone else but Tugger he damn well would have succeeded.

Tugger shook his head at him before pulling him back in and going back to his grooming. “You’re hopeless.”

* * *

_Quaxo was squeezed in between Rumpleteazer and Mungojerrie as they fed. Jennyanydots was chatting animatedly to her mate, Skimbleshanks, who was visiting from the railway station. Quaxo generally got handed around between the queens, but Jenny was secretly Quaxo’s favourite. She was always so relaxed about everything and Skimbleshanks was enthusiastic about everything. Rumpleteazer and Mungojerrie were often a bit loud for Quaxo’s liking but he had found that when they were alone he got on with them quite well._

_There was a commotion from the entrance to the nursery. Quaxo ignored it, too happily feeding to pay anything too much attention._

_“Hello Tugger.” Jenny greeted, making both Quaxo and Rumple quickly stop what they were doing and look up._

_Tugger was attempting to look relaxed as he cross the den but his overly large paws got in his way, tripping him up. Rumpleteazer giggled as Tugger corrected himself. Quaxo used Tugger’s distraction to wipe his mouth with the back of one paw covertly._

_“Morning Jenny,” Tugger said when he’d gotten his legs untangled._

_“Here to collect Quaxo?” She asked with an amused smile._

_“Only if you’re finished with him.”_

_Quaxo rolled his eyes. Tugger was never polite to anyone unless he wanted something out of them._

_“Well that’s up to him,” Jenny turned to look down at Quaxo, “Finished are you?”_

_Quaxo nodded quickly. Truly he would have liked to have had some more but he wasn’t about to do it in front of the older tom. Tugger was completely off mother’s milk by now, and had been for a good while, and Quaxo always felt self-conscious about showing his age when he was around._

_“Well then,” Jenny smiled, “I can’t see any reason why you can’t go off and play.”_

_Quaxo quickly started climbing over her back legs to get to Tugger’s side._

_“Can I go too?” Rumple begged with wide eyes._

_Jenny turned her gaze on her own daughter. “Not until you’ve had a bath.”_

_“Why do I have to have a bath when Quaxo doesn’t?” She whined._

_“Because Quaxo never seems to be in the state you are.” Jenny admonished, giving Skimble an amused look. “Really dear, how do you always end up such mess?”_

_Tugger and Quaxo exchanged a look as they started backing away. They could still hear Rumpleteazer complaining as they exited the nursery._

_“So what are we doing today then?” Quaxo asked eagerly._

_“I was thinking we’d go down to the stream,” Tugger hummed, “apparently Maine coons are supposed to like swimming, but I’ve never tried it. I’m sure I’ll be good at it.”_

_Quaxo wasn’t usually the sort to go off on adventures, not like Mungojerrie and Tumblebrutus, but somehow Tugger always made it seem like the best idea in the world. Especially because Quaxo always seemed to get away with so much more when he was with the older tom. Tugger was old enough that no one expected him to have supervision all the time, but he was also notorious enough that on the old occasion they did get in trouble the adults would always just blame Tugger for everything. It was dreadfully convenient for Quaxo._

_“Oh I can practice my pouncing!” Quaxo bounced excitedly._

_“You don’t want to come swimming?” Tugger asked as they headed towards the edge of the junkyard._

_Quaxo pulled a face making the older tom laugh._

_“Ok, no swimming for you,” Tugger grinned as they walked, or as he walked and Quaxo trotted to keep up with Tugger’s much longer legs, “you can just watch. I’m sure I’ll look quite impressive.”_

_Quaxo shook his head in fond amusement as they reached the edge of the field between them and the stream. Asparagus was on lookout and nodded to them but didn’t try to stop them as they left. He was talking to someone out of Quaxo’s line of sight._

_“Anyone would think he was Tugger’s son, he’s so tiny.” Asparagus was saying as they passed._

_Quaxo tried not to show his embarrassment. He was aware that he was very small for his age. Of course he didn’t really do himself any favours spending all his free time with Tugger who had the opposite issue. Even considering the age difference between them the difference in their size was mildly astounding to anyone seeing them together for the first time. Tugger was only six months older but already he was easily the size of most of the full grown toms. Even if his legs seemed almost too long for his body but Jennyanydots had reassured him only the night before that he still had some growing to do and so would likely grow into his gangly limbs._

_Quaxo on the other hand was less than three months old but was already being surpassed in size by kittens half his age. The tuxedo tom found it rather humiliating that Jellylorum’s litter, who weren’t even a moon old, already came up to his shoulder. Etcetera would likely be bigger than him within the moon._

_“Tugger!”_

_Quaxo tried not to grind his teeth as Tumblebrutus came bounding towards them. It wasn’t that he disliked the older tom, it was just that Tumble and Tugger were much closer in age then Quaxo and Tugger and Quaxo often felt like he had to remind the other tom that he was in fact Tugger’s best friend not Tumblebrutus._

_Tugger grinned at the other tom. “Whata doing Tumble?”_

_“Was just going to ask you the same question,” Tumblebrutus replied, crashing through the dead grass around them, “I was just- Oh hello Quaxo.”_

_Quaxo glared at him, annoyed that he hadn’t even noticed he was there. Of course the grass around them was taller than Quaxo was but that wasn’t the point._

_“Quaxo and I were just heading down to the stream,” Tugger replied, not bothered by Quaxo’s thunderclapped face, “I want to try swimming.”_

_“Swimming?” Tumble laughed, as he fell in beside Tugger, forcing Quaxo to move over. “We’re cats not fish.”_

_“Ah but see, I am a Maine coon, or at least half of one,” Tugger answered as they continued towards the stream, “and Maine coons are apparently really good swimmers.”_

_“Who told you that? Cause if it was Alonzo you should know by now to ignore everything he says.”_

_“No!” Tugger exclaimed, though based upon his tone Quaxo had a serious suspicion that was precisely who he’d heard it from._

_“Well at least it’s hot today,” Tumble went on, “so if you fall in you won’t freeze to death.”_

_“It is warm,” Tugger agreed, “a little too warm for my liking.”_

_“I think it’s nice,” Quaxo chirped._

_“I don’t like the heat either,” Tumble continued unabated and Quaxo’s foul mood only intensified at being ignored. “But even I’m not so desperate as to purposely get wet.”_

_“Well you’re loss,” Tugger replied with a shrug, “I’m going to cool off!”_

_Tugger took off across the meadow. Tumble was a little slow to catch on but he took off after him. Quaxo scrambled to keep up even though there was little hope of that. It was only moments before they were so far ahead that he gave up. Quaxo huffed as he slowly back to a walk. Figures, they always forgot that he couldn’t do all the stuff they could. Quaxo thought that it really wasn’t fair, it wasn’t his fault he was so little. He ate and ate in the hope that he’d get bigger but it very clearly wasn’t working. Even Rumple and Mungo were bigger then him now and they were younger than he was._

_Quaxo kept on slowly making his way towards the stream. Tugger would notice he was missing eventually. He might have been absent minded but he never purposely discluded Quaxo like some of the others did. He plodded on, kicking at the dry earth and sending plums of dust into the air in front of him. Being the smallest really sucked._

_The grass was harder to push through without Tugger clearing the way but at least without the other two he was able to set the pace. His legs always hurt when he’d spent too much time walking with the big cat, just from trying to keep up and not slow Tugger down._

_He was pretty sure he was getting close now. He could hear the bubbling of the stream, but he couldn’t see it over the yellow grass. He picked up his pace a little, eager to see if Tugger really was actually good at swimming. It seemed likely that he would be, even if he had got that information from Alonzo. After all Tugger was good at practically everything._

_He pushed through what he thought was the last of the grass before the stream and stumbled forward suddenly as the ground dropped out from under him._

_He squeaked as he tumbled forward into a roll, paws going straight over his head. He tucked his chin into his chest and waited for it to stop._

_Only it didn’t._

_Instead he plunged in freezing water._

_The shock of cold had him sucking in a breath. Water rushed into his mouth and nose, stinging the whole way and making him splutter. Quaxo kicked out his legs instinctively but found nothing to push against. He was tumbled over and over by the current._

_The stream was murky and full of reeds and rubbish. Quaxo could see nothing past the murkiness. He squeezed his eyes shut again, not wanting to see how far he was being carried. He just knew that he’d end up getting washed into the Thames and would never see the junkyard again. After all no one had been there to see it happen._

_This was it._

_He’d either drown._

_Or end up on the street._

_Quaxo was quite sure he’d prefer to drown._

_Suddenly there was pain at the base of his neck. Something sharp stabbed into him, and then his head was breaking the surface._

_Quaxo sucked in a lung full of air before coughing violently. Water streamed out of nose and down his muzzle as he realised that the thing poking into his skin was a set of teeth._

_“Here!” Tumble was on the bank waving his arms around, “Over here! Give him to me.”_

_Tugger, who had only a precarious grasp on the back of Quaxo’s neck, paddled firmly towards the bank, dragging Quaxo with him. Quaxo continued to cough as Tugger got his front paws on a rock and pushed him half up the bank. Tumblebrutus grabbed him by one arm and dragged him the rest of the way out of the water._

_Quaxo sprawled out in the dirt, water running off him and turning the dust to mud. He continued to cough as he desperately tried to clear the water from his airways. He only kept his eyes open long enough to see Tugger climb out of the stream, fur plastered to his body making him look a lot skinnier then he usually did._

_“Is he alright?” Tugger gasped, clearly out of breath._

_“I think so.” Tumble said from somewhere behind him, “At least… he’s breathing.”_

_“What do you mean you think?” Tugger exclaimed, pushing Tumble out of the way to get a better look at the bedraggled kitten. “Quaxo? Are you alright?”_

_Quaxo forced his eyes open to find Tugger concerned face hovering just above his. He tried to nod but even that felt like it took too much energy._

_“We saw you go head first into the water,” Tumble said, head squeezing into frame from the other side. “Gave us quite a fright.”_

_“When I said I wanted to try swimming I didn’t really intend to do it like that.” Tugger joked as he patted at Quaxo shoulder gently._

_“Yeah but at least we know you can swim now!” Tumble exclaimed, giving Tugger a shove. “Clearly Maine coon’s do like water.”_

_“I really would have preferred to find that out without putting my best friend’s life at risk.” Tugger snapped, a little shortly before refocusing on Quaxo. “How do you feel? Can you get up?”_

_Quaxo blinked at him slowly before managing to speak. “You look like a drowned pollicle.”_

_A large grin spread over Tugger’s face. “Oh yeah? Well you look like a drowned rat, so there.”_


	2. Chapter 2

Quaxo sat atop the pipe keeping a careful eye on Jemima and Electra playing nearby. He wasn’t usually considered old enough to be put on babysitting duty but Bomba had needed to relieve herself and so he was left watching them, at least in the short term.

They were playing something that looked suspiciously like leap frog. Electra and Pouncivil were nearby climbing atop the nursery, but thankfully Asparagus was keeping an eye on them so Quaxo didn’t have to. It was unusual to see Pouncivil with the younger queens. He was the only tom in that years kits, besides Coricopat, and usually preferred to follow his big brother around rather than play with the other kittens. Quaxo felt rather fond of Pouncivil, after all he knew what it was like to be the littlest and desperate to be involved with the big toms,’ even if he was a bit loud.

Jemima and Electra however were the youngest and so needed the most watching. Bombalurina and Demeter had shown up a month ago, both heavily pregnant and not willing to talk about the fathers. The junkyard had welcomed them, just as they’d welcomed Quaxo and then Plato back in the day, and now the tribe had four new queens.

Quaxo flicked his tail in amusement as Jemima went sprawling face first in the dirt after having completely failed to make the jump over Electra. Munkustrap, standing on guard duty nearby on the tire, glanced at him before following his gaze to view the kittens. Quaxo hadn’t had a lot to do with Munkustrap recently. When he was little he and Tugger often butted heads with him over one prank or another, but when Quaxo had drifted away from Tugger he’d had little reason to interact with the Jellicle Protector.

However it was difficult to have anything to do with the kittens without running into Munkustrap. Quaxo hoped Bomba was coming back soon; Munkustrap always made him a little nervous. Probably just residual guilt from all the stunts he’d pulled as a kitten. Frankly Quaxo would have quite liked Munkustrap to like him, to see him as a responsible, adult tom, but his old association with Tugger had killed that idea before it even got going.

By the time Bomba had reappeared Electra was busy chewing on Quaxo’s tail which he’d hung down off the pipe for them to chase. Bomba gave him a grateful smile before ushering her daughter and niece away to find shelter as it started to spit.

Quaxo sighed as Tugger and his admirers appeared from across the clearing, probably driven from wherever they had been by the oncoming rain. Worse though, Mungojerrie was amongst them. It only took the calico tom a moment to spot Quaxo sitting along and to make a beeline for him.

“Watcha doing Quaxo?” He asked, swaggering up to him and leaning against the side of the pipe. “Out here all alone are you?”

Quaxo raised a confused eyebrow at him. “I’m usually alone but ok…”

“You know you’re always quiet welcome to come join us right?” Mungo replied with an easy smile, “You don’t need to be alone if you don’t want to be. I’d be happy to keep you company.”

“I’m fine.”

“Yes, you are.”

Quaxo blinked at him in confusion. Mungojerrie was gazing at him with an absent smile and Quaxo got the distinct impression that he was missing something.

Quaxo flinched as a paw landed on his shoulder.

“Is this cat bothering you Quaxo?” Tumblebrutus asked, glaring at Mungo who puffed up his chest in response.

“Um… no?” Quaxo hadn’t intended it to come out sounding like a question but oh well.

“You sure?” Tumble continued, pushing forward so he was between Quaxo and the other tom. “Because I’d be happy to remove him for you.”

“Hey! We were just talking,” Mungo insisted, chest to chest with the brown and white tom, “we’re allowed to talk aren’t we? No rules against that.”

“Not if you’re disturbing him you’re not.”

“I wasn’t…”

“Tumble it’s fine,” Quaxo added in quickly, reaching out of grab him by the wrist, “he wasn’t doing anything to annoy me.”

Tumblebrutus turned his back on Mungo suddenly and took his paw in his own. “Are you absolutely sure?”

“Ah… yes?”

Now Tumble was gazing at him in a strangely earnest fashion and Quaxo found that almost as confusing as Mungo’s earlier look had been.

The rain started falling harder then.

“We should fine some shelter.” Tumble commented, looking up at the sky.

“You’d be welcome to come shelter with me Quaxo.” Mungo said over Tumblebrutus’ shoulder.

“You don’t even have a den here!” Tumble exclaimed, turning back to the calico tom. “Where were you planning on taking him? All the way to your human’s place in Victoria Grove? You’d be soaked by the time you were half way there.”

“No, of course not,” Mungo was saying, glaring back at Tumblebrutus, “but we could find somewhere out of the rain here. I grew up here remember. I know my way around.”

The rain was coming faster now, and Quaxo started inching backwards. The other two toms were really going at it now and Quaxo really didn’t want to get stuck in the middle of a fight. Particularly when he didn’t even really know what they were fighting about.

Quaxo slide silently off the pipe and then quickly up and onto the tire. He hastily turned so he was out of their line of sight before taking a moment to think about where he was actually planning on going. He didn’t have a den of his own yet. He usually shared with Jenny and Skimble because Skimbleshanks was rarely there at night, but Mungojerrie was their son and he’d likely seek shelter there.

Quaxo had actually been considering an offer from Tumble to move in with him and George but with his current behaviour that didn’t seem particularly appealing either. The nursery was always an option, but he’d have to put up with the kittens and he really wanted time to think and try to figure out what in the world was going on.

A gentle tap on the shoulder had him turning to find Munkustrap behind him. The grey tabby pointed up at the curtain which Quaxo knew led to his and Tugger’s den.

“Hide as long as you need.”

Quaxo closed his eyes for a moment in relief before giving Munkustrap a grateful smile. “Thank you. I don’t know what’s gotten into them.”

Munkustrap gave him an amused smile. “Never been fought over before hu?”

Quaxo stared at him in wide eyed confusion.

“Don’t worry about it. They’ll get over it eventually.” Munkustrap shook his head, showing Quaxo in even more water. “Go on, get out of the rain. It won’t be long before they notice you’ve gone.”

Munkustrap reached up to pull the blanket back from the entrance and Quaxo quickly climbed up and scrambled inside. The silver tabby let the blanket fall back into place behind him, casting the large den back into shadow. It was a cozy den even if the floor was uneven and sloped back towards the far end. There were two large nests. One neat and tidy, with a small pile of yarn balls next to it. The other was a garish pile of blankets and pillows in clashing colours and patterns. No need to guess which tom belonged to which bed.

Quaxo sighed and settled down on a cushion next to the door to set about drying out his thin coat. He wasn’t entirely soaked through but it wouldn’t have taken much longer to get to that point. He was incredibly grateful to Munkustrap from saving him, and couldn’t help but think that if it had been Tugger the tom would have demanded that he ask for the help before giving it just to be obtuse.

He wondered how long it would take for the arguing toms to notice he was gone and if they’d try looking for him. At least no one would find him here. No one would expect him to be inside Munk and Tugger’s den after all.

Quaxo still couldn’t quite figure out what had happened. Munkustrap had said they were fighting over him, but that seemed ridiculous. Why would anyone fight over him? Fight over him for what? And why? Mungojerrie had always been a bit of a troublemaker so maybe he’d done something else to annoy Tumble and Tumble had just used him as an excuse to have a go at Mungo. That seemed more likely. Tumblebrutus had always liked a good argument, and he’d been a little protective of Quaxo ever since his adventure in the stream that time, so maybe it was a straw that broke the camel’s back situation. Yes, that must have been it.

Quaxo felt much better, having sorted that out. He didn’t like not knowing what was going on. It made him feel off kilter.

Quaxo went back to fixing his coat.

There was a blast of cold air from the entrance and Tugger appeared in silhouette against the stormy sky.

“Hello little one.”

Quaxo swallowed. This was an unexpected and unwelcome turn of events. Quaxo didn’t need to be more confused right now.

“Hiding out are we?”

Quaxo gave a long suffering sigh. “You’re brother tell you were I was?”

“He didn’t need to,” Tugger gave a shrug as he came to sit beside him, water running off him in streams. “I saw it all.”

“Oh good.”

“I knew there had to be someone interested in you.” Tugger ignored his sarcasm. “Lucky for you they’re both toms so you’ve got choices.”

“What do you mean interested in me?”

Tugger gave him an amused frown. “As in they want to jump your arse. What did you think I meant?”

“What? No!” Quaxo’s mouth hung open in horror. “They don’t… I mean... Tumble-”

“Tumble was just getting a little territorial over you.” Tugger cut him off, shaking like a pollicle and showing Quaxo in even more second hand water. “He’s probably already warned all the other junkyard toms off you, but Mungojerrie isn’t here often enough to know.”

“What do you mean ‘warn them off’?” Quaxo asked flabbergasted enough to not even complain about the Maine coon getting him wet again.

“Oh you know,” Tugger waved a paw at him dismissively, “because you’re taken or whatever.”

“But I’m not!”

Tugger gave him a curious look. “Tumble hasn’t made a move on you then?”

“No!”

“Really? Not at all?”

“No.”

“He hasn’t been hanging around you more, or being more touchy then normal or implied that you should spend more time together?”

Quaxo opened his mouth to say no before remembering his suggested sleeping arrangements. “Well… he asked if I might want to share a den with him.”

“There you go.”

“But lots of people share dens with people they aren’t involved with!” Quaxo pointed out quickly. “I mean look at you and Munk. And he already shares with George.”

“Yes but he’s my brother,” Tugger shook his head in amusement, “most people share dens with siblings, close friends or mates. Are you and Tumble close friends?”

“Well…” Quaxo bit his lip for a moment, “not very close, but we’re friends. And he’s less annoying then most of the other toms.”

“Well then, clearly that was an invitation to be something more.” Tugger stated, rearranging his mane like that was the end of the matter.

“But I don’t want more!”

Tugger glanced at him sideways. “No?”

“No!”

Tugger shrugged. “Well you could always have Jerrie instead. He’s clearly also interested.”

“What?”

“Why else would he get his back up about Tumble getting in between you?”

“But we were kittens together.”

“We were all kittens together,” Tugger said dryly, “it’d be a bit weird if you went for someone old enough that you weren’t kittens together at some stage, at least at your age.”

“No I mean,” Quaxo groaned as he tried to reorder his thoughts into something coherent, “we both nursed from the same queen. It’d be weird.”

“Quaxo, you were an orphan.” Tugger pointed out unnecessarily. “You nursed from basically every adult queen in the junkyard. If you’re looking for someone not related to one of those queens I’m afraid you’d have very few options.”

“That’s not true! You and I didn’t nurse from the same queen.” Tugger raised his eyebrows at him with a smirk and Quaxo spluttered to come up with another name. “And Missy didn’t have any kits when I was little so I never nursed from her either.”

“Yes but you’re not into Queens,” Tugger smiled smugly at him, “and even if you were Missy is too old and Victoria too young so... guess that just leaves you with me.”

Quaxo groaned again as he dragged a paw over his face. “There are other cats outside of the junkyard. I don’t have to just confine myself to cats I already know.”

“That’s true.” Tugger admitted with a nod. “But how often do you really leave the yard? It’s not like you go into town very often.”

“Well no.”

“So back to me again.”

Quaxo sighed in exasperation. “You’re an utter bore you know that?”

“Hey now, you’re hiding out in my den remember,” Tugger smirked at him, “I could leave you to the mercy of Tumblebrutus and Mungojerrie if you’d prefer.”

Quaxo hid his face in his paws as Tugger laughed. “I hate you.”

“Love you too little one.”

Quaxo glared at the grinning tom.

“So you’re really not interested in either of them?”

Quaxo frowned as he took his paws away from his face. “No, not really. I mean I hadn’t really thought about it before because I didn’t realise that they were interested but… no.”

“Not at all?”

“I mean…” Quaxo trailed off as he thought about it. Tumblebrutus really wasn’t that bad. The two of them got along well and he was almost a match for Quaxo when it came to dancing. He was calmer than the other younger toms as well, save for perhaps Plato. Quaxo supposed that if he had to choose someone he might pick Tumble, assuming it was absolutely necessary to mate.

Mungojerrie on the other hand was loud and obnoxious. He never took anything seriously, except perhaps for sex, and was always demanding attention. He wasn’t a bad looking cat though. He was fairly tall and had good shoulders and legs, but Quaxo had a hard time imagining himself having sex with him. Though, Quaxo had a hard time picturing himself having sex with anyone. Well except for…

“No. No I don’t have any interest in either of them.”

“Took a while to come to that conclusion.” Tugger hummed at him with a smirk.

“I am not interested in Tumble or Mungo,” Quaxo restated, “at least not for sex or mating.”

“Hmm,” Tugger gave him a critical look, “so not Tumble, or Mungo, or Plato hu? It seems odd that a tom your age isn’t interested in someone. I was obsessed with sex when I was your age.”

“Tugger you’re still obsessed with sex.”

The Maine coon grinned at him. “That’s true, but everyone else was obsessed with sex at your age too. I mean just look at how Mungo and Tumble were acting out there.”

“Yes, utterly ridiculously,” Quaxo said with a huff, “if that’s what sex does to you I don’t want any part of it.”

“You’re not… you’re not like Cassandra are you?”

“Hu?”

“Cassandra, you know... how she’s not interested in sex at all.” Tugger explained slowly.

“Oh no,” Quaxo shook his head, “I mean… I don’t think so.”

“So you’ve had sexual thoughts before?”

“Well, yes.”

“About who?”

“Nope.”

“Naw, come on.” Tugger whined shoving his still wet face into the back of Quaxo’s neck. “I’ll tell you mind if you tell me yours.”

“You’d tell me about yours either way.” Quaxo replied, shoving him away.

Tugger pouted at him but seemed to accept the response. “Well you’re gonna have to tell the boys you’re not interested then. Unless you like having them fight over you. I know some cats like that. Bombalurina for example has kept both me and Alonzo guessing since she arrived.”

“Told you you’d tell me about yours anyway.”

“Haha,” Tugger said sarcastically, “seriously though. You’ll need some way to show them you’re not interested.”

“And how am I supposed to do that? They didn’t exactly give me much of a chance to talk out there just now. And you know I’m not good with words. I’d just end up getting all tongue tired and awkward.”

“That’s true,” Tugger admitted. “And you’re so cute when you’re flustered it’d probably just encourage them. Suppose you could let them think you were interested in someone else.”

“And have them go into competition with them as well? No thank you.” Quaxo shook his head at Tugger’s hair brain scheme even as he resolutely ignored his other comment. “Or worse, have it get back to whatever cat I’d used as a scape goat and then end up with three cats after me. Really, I am so not equipped for this.”

Tugger chuckled, “Guess you’d better get used to it then.”

“I don’t want to get used to it!” Quaxo exclaimed in despair. “I want it to go away and never have to deal with this ever again!”

“Well I guess that answers my question about whether or not you like being fought over.” Tugger joked.

“Of course I don’t like it. What sort of idiot likes this?” Quaxo wailed loudly.

“Well a lot of cats from what I understand,” Tugger said thoughtfully, “makes them feel wanted or whatever.”

“Do you like it?” Quaxo screwed up his face in disgust.

“Well… I mean I generally don’t need to be fought over, there’s plenty of me to go around for everyone.” Tugger smirked at him, but he had a wet piece of fur stuck to the end of his nose so really it looked rather ridiculous. “No need for anyone to fight. Threesomes are a completely-”

“Oh Bast, stop talking!” Quaxo hid his face again. Thankfully Tugger shut up, but when Quaxo finally came out from his hiding spot it was to find the Maine coon doing a very good impersonation of the Cheshire cat. “I suppose I shouldn’t ask you for advice then.”

“Well no, probably not,” Tugger said with a slight nod, “because my advice would be to enjoy it, but if you’re really desperate to get rid of them. I might have an idea.”

Quaxo looked at him suspiciously as he stood up and walked towards the door. “Where are you going?”

“To get some food.” Tugger said with a shrug. “Want some? It doesn’t look like the rain is going to stop anytime soon and if a cat with your coat and size goes out there you’ll probably get washed away so I’ll just get you something while I’m out. I should probably get my brother something too.” He added as somewhat of an afterthought.

“I thought you were going to help me.”

“Oh I am,” Tugger agreed as he pulled the blanket back, “but there’s nothing we can do right now so there’s no rush. I’ll be back.”

He disappeared out into the rain and left Quaxo there feeling even more confused than he had before. In the grand scheme of things Quaxo kinda wished he could go back to being invisible.

* * *

_"Quaxo!” Tugger hissed under his breath. “Quaxo, wake up.”_

_The tuxedo kitten blinked open heavy eyelids to find the Maine coon standing over him, glancing around covertly._

_“What? What time is it?” Quaxo asked around a yawn._

_“Shhh!” Tugger hushed, shoving a paw over the smaller tom’s mouth. “You’ve got to be quiet.”_

_“Why?” He mumbled._

_“Just do what I say,” Tugger replied, backing away, “Follow me.”_

_Quaxo shook his head as he rolled to his feet, trying to avoid stepping on Etcetera who was snoring loudly beside him. Personally Quaxo thought Tugger was being overly cautious, after all if they could sleep through the noise she was making then they could probably sleep through anything._

_Quaxo followed Tugger to the entrance of the nursery and out into the night, dodging queens and kittens the whole way._

_“Tugger what’s going on?” Quaxo asked as he emerged into the cool night._

_“Sh! Over here, we don’t want to get caught.”_

_Quaxo ducked into the shadow of the nursery entrance where Tugger was sitting crouched down, shooting fugitive looks towards the tire where the night guard was likely be posted._

_“What are we doing?”_

_“Can you use some magic to hide us, or make us harder to see at least?”_

_“I don’t know. Maybe,” Quaxo turned his back to the tire so if his paws started glowing the guard wouldn’t see, “just a second.”_

_Quaxo concentrated on the darkness, pulling and shaping it until it bent around them. His paws sparkled, but he managed to stop it from spreading to the rest of him._

_“Brilliant!” Tugger whispered excitedly. “Come with me.”_

_“Where to?” Quaxo asked again as Tugger started towing him further into the junkyard._

_“You know how Father visited today?” Tugger asked, not letting go of Quaxo’s arm._

_“Yes?” Quaxo replied in confusion, unable to figure how this could possibly lead to him being dragged out of his nice warm bed in the middle of the night._

_“Well he came to start Munkustrap’s training as the next protector.”_

_“Good for him?”_

_“And I overheard them talking about a meteor shower.”_

_“A what?”_

_“A meteor shower.” Tugger repeated it as if saying it again made it any clearer to Quaxo._

_“I don’t know what that is.”_

_Quaxo ran into Tugger’s back as the older kit stopped suddenly._

_“I don’t really know what it is either.” Tugger admitted, scratching at his mane awkwardly. “But apparently it’s happening tonight.”_

_Quaxo frowned as the chill crept into his fur. “Where?”_

_“In the sky!”_

_“What?” Quaxo was getting more and more confused by the minute._

_“I think meteors are like stars?” Tugger said it like it was a question. “But bigger maybe?”_

_“Like the moon?”_

_“Maybe.” Tugger shrugged and started pulling him along again. “We’ve got to find somewhere up high to watch from.”_

_“Where?”_

_“Where’s the highest place you can think of?”_

_“The pile above your brother’s den.”_

_“Ok… where’s the highest spot you can think of where we won’t get caught?”_

_Quaxo thought for a long minute, trying to figure out where exactly would be visible to the guard. “Somewhere behind that pile, so it can block us from view.”_

_Tugger stopped again but Quaxo avoiding running into him this time. “I was going to say the stack next to the gate but now that you mention it your idea is better. New plan!” Tugger changed direction dramatically and started dragging Quaxo back the way they had come._

_Quaxo shook his head but jogged along in the Maine coon’s wake anyway. Tugger was always coming up with hair brained schemes, but Quaxo didn’t mind; they were fun and he liked being the one Tugger went to to execute them._

_Soon they were standing in the shadow of the big metal shipping container behind the aforementioned pile of rubbish._

_“How are we supposed to get up there?” Quaxo asked in disbelief staring up at the distant roof._

_“I’m sure there’s a way,” Tugger replied starting to circle around it. “I saw Skimbleshanks up there one time. So there must be a way.”_

_Quaxo sighed and started looking. If Tugger knew that someone else had managed it he wouldn’t give up until he had to._

_“Hey, Quaxo! Around here!”_

_Quaxo trotted around to the far side of the box._

_“If I climb up there,” Tugger said, pointing up to the top of an old fridge, “I can pull you up behind me then lift you up.”_

_“And how do you get up afterwards?” Quaxo asked doubtfully._

_“I’ll figure something out.” Tugger gave him an easy shrug, “But at least we’d have half the job done.”_

_Tugger studied the fridge for a moment before backing up and taking a running jump and… completely missing the top. The Maine coon frowned at it as Quaxo looked around. He trotted away while Tugger tried again, coming back moments later with a small box._

_Tugger grinned at him before trying again, this time jumping onto the box and then up again. His paws scrambled at the top of the fridge and slid off._

_Tugger hit the ground and huffed, before readying himself to try again. Quaxo bit his lip, watching in concern, knowing full well that if he landed wrong or fell he could break an ankle like Alonzo had done that one time._

_Thankfully when Tugger made the jump this time, his claws caught at on the ledge of the top of the fridge and held. Tugger slowly managed to pull his weight up until he was able to get an elbow up on the fridge and then scrambled the rest of the way up._

_“Ok,” Tugger called, “you’re turn. Jump up and grab my paw and I’ll pull you up.”_

_Quaxo had the easier job. Yes he was a lot smaller which made the jump a lot bigger but all he hand to do was stick his arm up and let Tugger grab him. He was so small that Tugger lifted him up easily onto the top of the fridge, which Quaxo realised once he was up there was actually the bottom of the fridge as it was leaning against the metal box upside down._

_“Now you get on my shoulders and see if you can reach the top!” Tugger said excitedly bending over to allow Quaxo to clamber up._

_Quaxo awkwardly climbed up his back, ignoring Tugger’s groans of protest when he pulled on his mane. Eventually Quaxo got situated on Tugger’s shoulders and the older tom rose unsteadily on his hind legs. He lent against the metal to stop himself from over balancing, before stepping up close._

_“Can you reach?”_

_Quaxo put his hands up above his head but found himself a good tail’s length short._

_“Give me a minute.” Quaxo said, leaning heavily on Tugger’s head as he pulled his paws up and onto his shoulder._

_“Quaxo, what are you doing?!” Tugger asked in alarm as the small tom slowly stood up on his shoulder. “If you fall you could kill yourself.”_

_“Just a minute, I’m almost there.” Quaxo insisted, leaning forward against the metal and slowly walking his front paws up it as he rose to his full height. He was almost there, he was only a little bit short now, he just needed…_

_“Quaxo!”_

_“Yes!” Quaxo exclaimed as he pushed up off the top of Tugger’s head and grabbed the ledge. “I’ve got it, I’m fine,” he said, scrambling up and onto the cold metal._

_Once he was up he turned to look back down at Tugger who seemed to have recovered from his scare and was now trying to jump for the edge himself. He was coming up short, just as Quaxo had predicted._

_“Told you.”_

_“And just like I told you,” Tugger shot back, “at least half the job is done. Can you look around from up there and see if there might be another way up?”_

_Quaxo did as he was told. There was a ledge on the rubbish pile next to it that might be within leaping distance of the top of the metal container but the sound of him landing on the metal would likely be very loud and they were trying to avoid getting caught._

_Quaxo screwed up his face as he thought about it. Maybe there was a way he could us magic to dampen the sound? Unless…_

_Quaxo moved quickly back over to the side where Tugger was still waiting._

_“Find anything?”_

_Quaxo held up a paw for silence and went to work, paws sparkling as he focused on the little box next to the fridge. He moved small objects around all the time. How much more difficult could something bigger be? After all, it was magic._

_Slowly, ever so slowly the box rose off the ground and floated shakily to the top of the fridge._

_“Grab it!” Quaxo hissed, not knowing how long he could hold it there for._

_Tugger reached out and snatched it out of the air allowing Quaxo to release the magic. His whole arms and chest were lit up like the night sky but with the box on top of the fridge Tugger was able to climb up easily._

_“You are a genius.” Tugger said as he flopped down on the metal, breathing heavily from dragging himself up._

_“I know.” Quaxo replied with a smirk._

_“All right, smarty pants.” Tugger laughed reaching for Quaxo’s leg but the smaller tom danced away. Eventually Tugger rolled to his feet and stood up next to him. “Now, where are these meteors?”_

_“You tell me.” Quaxo looked up at the night sky as the stars faded from his own coat._

_“Hmm,” Tugger hummed as he inspected the expanse of stars, “they all look normal to me.”_

_“Do you think maybe we missed it?” Quaxo asked, strangely nervous. “While we were getting up.”_

_“I don’t know,” Tugger admitted, “maybe we just have to wait.”_

_“But Tugger, it’s cold!” Quaxo whined as the Maine coon sat down on the bare metal._

_Tugger huffed, “Well we’re not going back inside now. Not after it took us so long to get up here.”_

_Quaxo pouted at him._

_“Fine, come here then.”_

_Quaxo grinned and flung himself down on top of the other tom. Tugger groaned at the collision but managed to prevent either of them rolling off the edge of the container. The large tom quickly rearranged them so Quaxo was seated between his legs, facing away from him but sheltered from the chill by Tugger’s limbs. Quaxo half turned and burrowed into Tugger’s mane, loving having an excuse to cuddle. Tugger didn’t like cuddling, so Quaxo always had to talk him into it. Thankfully no one else was around so Tugger was less likely to complain._

_Tugger didn’t comment as Quaxo curled up and promptly went back to sleep._

_“Quaxo?”_

_The tuxedo tom blinked open his eyes, wondering how long he’d been out for. “Yeah?”_

_“I’m sorry about the other day.”_

_“Which other day?”_

_“When you and I were hunting mice and Tumble and George came over and wanted to climb the tree?” Tugger explained slowly._

_“What about it?” Quaxo asked, nuzzling at Tugger’s chest and not really wanting to think about it._

_“I’m sorry that they wanted to ditch you and complained so much about having to help you up.” Tugger sighed. “It wasn’t very nice of them._

_Quaxo sighed and sat up more so he could look at him. “Its fine, it wasn’t you fault, or theirs’s really. It’s not anyone’s fault that I’m so small.”_

_“Yeah but that doesn’t make it right,” Tugger insisted, “You’ll grow eventually.”_

_Quaxo shrugged. “Eventually. Maybe.”_

_“You know I don’t mean to keep accidentally leaving you behind, don’t you?” Tugger asked, sounding worried. “I just get carried away when all the other toms show up and I get competitive and they always seem to show up these day…”_

_“It’s all right,” Quaxo shrugged, “they just want to hang out with you. Can’t really blame them for that. They like you best, everyone likes you best.”_

_“Well you know what?”_

_“What?”_

_“I like you best.”_

_Quaxo grinned before Tugger pulled him in for a rough hug. Quaxo laughed as he tried to wriggle away to prevent Tugger rubbed his coat up the wrong way._

_“Stop it!” Quaxo cried as he laughed._

_“Nope. Sharn’t.”_

_They continued to roll around on the roof of the container until suddenly Tugger stopped._

_“Quaxo look!” Tugger cried, pointing towards the horizon._

_Quaxo spun around worried they’d been caught, they weren’t exactly being quiet after all, but that wasn’t what Tugger was pointing at. Low towards the horizon streaks of light flashed in and out of existence._

_Quaxo stared. “Are they… are those meteors?”_

_“Must be.” Tugger whispered from behind him. “Told you it’d be cool.”_

_“What are they?”_

_“Meteors.”_

_Quaxo snapped out of his awed state long enough to role his eyes. “Yeah alright smarty pants.”_

_Tugger chuckled and wriggled in closer behind Quaxo so he could share his warmth without taking his eyes off of the falling stars. “I don’t know what they are, but they look cool.”_

_“Yeah they do.” Quaxo agreed easily, staring at the twinkling lights as Tugger wrapped his arms around him and warmth snuck back into his fur. “It’s very cool. Thank you Tugger, for making me come and see.”_

_Tugger purred behind him. “You’re welcome little one.”_

* * *

The rain had cleared up, and the days had started to get longer, and still Tugger hadn’t explained what his plan was to get Mungojerrie and Tumblebrutus to leave Quaxo alone. Quaxo was beginning to think that maybe Tugger had just forgotten. He’d never been the most constant or steady friend so Quaxo wouldn’t be hugely surprised if he’d gotten fascinated by something else and forgotten about it.

Unfortunately Quaxo couldn’t do the same.

Tumblebrutus wasn’t so bad, but now that Quaxo understood what was going on it was a lot more noticeable. The brown and white tom often came and sat with him during the day, or brought him food without being asked. The other cats their age did seem to being giving them a wide berth whenever they were together which made Quaxo think Tugger was probably right for once and that Tumble had in fact warned the other cats off.

Mungojerrie wasn’t so easy to deal with. To put it frankly, he was obnoxious. He was always showing up and flopping all over him. The calico tom had no understanding of personal space, and worse, he didn’t need another person to carry a conversation. Tumble at least would wait for Quaxo’s replied to questions, but Mungo needed no such prompting. He could talk the hind leg off a policle. On the up hand it did mean that Quaxo usually didn’t have to pay attention to what he was saying.

Thankfully Quaxo hadn’t had to deal with both of them at the same time again yet, though he knew it was only a matter of time. The only reason it hadn’t happened already was because Mungo had gone back to his humans for a few days while Rumpleteazer road out a heat. Apparently watching his littermate be hit on by absolutely everyone was somewhat disturbing to him.

But the sun had come back now and Rumple seemed to have gotten over it as well. Victoria had told Quaxo in no uncertain terms that Rumple was most definitely not pregnant which had made Quaxo question exactly what she knew that the rest of them didn’t. Honestly Quaxo would feel a little weird if she was pregnant considering she was younger then him. It was weird enough seeing Bombalurina, who was Cassandra’s age, pregnant never lone Rumpleteazer.

To begin with Quaxo had taken to trying to find more out of the way spots to take his afternoon naps in, in the hopes he’d be harder to find. He’s quickly realised this was a mistake however. Mungojerrie was _much_ more forward when there was no one else around, and Tumble at least tried to actually flirt is there was no one watching. He’s asked Quaxo three more times if he was certain he didn’t want to move in with him since the storm.

The worst part was that Quaxo would have done it quite happily if he didn’t think it’d give Tumble the wrong idea. After all he really did want to find a den of his own but being alone also didn’t appeal to him at all. Quaxo had taken to bunking with Jellylorum, who had moved back out of the nursery now that Ecetera was weaned. Of course Jelly talked to her brother, who talked to his son, so Tumble had quickly become aware of this arrangement and now magically appeared some morning to bring him breakfast.

Quaxo had taken to getting up ridiculously early just to avoid him. Now, having caught his own breakfast and spent half the day out of sight down by the stream, Quaxo had finally given in and gone back to the junkyard.

Thankfully Plato was alone up on the car. Quaxo quickly joined him. The big tom would be a good buffer if either of the other two found him. Plato smiled at him as Quaxo laid himself out beside him on his stomach so he could keep an eye out.

“Hey, been hiding from your suitors?”

Quaxo sighed, if even Plato had noticed then everyone had noticed. “Have you seen either of them?”

“Tumble was around earlier but I haven’t seen him recently.”

“Thank the Everlasting Cat.”

Plato gave him an apologetic smile. “Neither of them seem willing to take a hint.”

“They’re certainly bold.”

Plato pulled a face. “Yes. Far bolder then I can ever imagine being.”

“I’m not sure it’s even possible to be bolder then Mungojerrie.” Quaxo joked, trying desperately to find something funny in all of this.

“Well, except for Rum Tum Tugger.”

Quaxo actually grinned then. “Yes, you’re right. Tugger is pretty much the definition of bold.” They both chuckled as Quaxo settled down for his nap. “Wake me up if either of them show up will you?”

Plato nodded and went back to watching Victoria practise her dancing as Quaxo let his eyes drift shut. He didn’t know how much later it was when Plato started shaking him but the sun had disappeared behind the clouds so it must have been a while.

Quaxo blinked open his heavy eyelids and glanced around. The first thing he noticed was that Tugger and his fan group were sitting scattered around the tire, but that evidently wasn’t what Plato was alerting him to. No what Plato was looking at was the two young toms yelling at each other near the oven.

“Get over yourself!” Tumblebrutus was yelling loudly as the crowd of cats around Tugger watched. “He’s not interested!”

“Well he’s more interested in me then he is of you!” Mungo shouted back.

“Bull shit!”

Quaxo felt like disappearing. This was probably the most embarrassing thing that had ever happened to him. They continued to screech at each other as Quaxo hid his face in his arms.

What he really didn’t understand was why neither of them had tried to include him in this conversation. Quaxo was rather grateful that they hadn’t but it was still baffling. In fact, neither of them had ever asked him if he was actually interested in them romantically or sexually. Of course Quaxo had also not outright told them that he wasn’t but he thought he’d been pretty clear in other ways that he didn’t want to be involved with either of them.

So Quaxo stay there with his face pressed against the backs of his front paws and tried to pretend he didn’t exist as the toms continued their loud debate. The last thing Quaxo wanted was to see the other cats’ reactions to these events. Plato still had a paw on his shoulder, rubbing idling in what Quaxo assumed was supposed to be a reassuring manner.

“Do you want me to distract them while you run?” Plato whispered even though the chance of anyone overhearing them was slim. 

“Are people looking?” Quaxo managed to get out even though he was pretty certain that there was no chance of him running for the simple fact that that would require him to look.

“Ummm…” Plato’s hesitation was enough to tell Quaxo all he needed to know.

“OH WOULD YOU TWO QUIT IT ALREADY?”

Quaxo didn’t think it was possible for him to feel more terror then he already had but the sound of Tugger’s voice at that volume managed it.

“He’s bloody well not interested in you!”

Quaxo glanced up from beneath his paws to find Tugger standing amid his crowd of admirers. The Maine coon always looked tall but from his position upon the tire, and with Tumble and Mungo being down on the ground, he looked positively ginormous.

“And how exactly would you know?” Mungojerrie asked shakily, clearly surprised by the intrusion.

“Maybe because I asked him.”

Tumble glanced at Quaxo but stood his ground. “He’s never said anything to us.”

Tugger threw his paws in the air. “Well yes, we were trying to keep it quiet, but then… Have you ever actually asked him if he was interested?”

The two toms glanced at each other.

“Well no-” Tumble started.

“Pfft, and how would you know?” Mungo cut him off. “You two haven’t been friends since you were a kit.”

Quaxo looked up in alarm as Tugger suddenly crossed to him. He stared up at the tall tom from his place still huddled on the ground.

“You wanna know how I know?” Tugger asked the two toms before looking down at Quaxo and offering him a paw.

Quaxo swallowed dryly. He knew Tugger was going to make him say it, in front of everyone and then the two toms would end up hating him. And Tumble was actually one of his closest friends, he didn’t want him to hate him. And he had no idea what Tugger meant about trying to keep ‘it’ quiet.

He looked up at Tugger before reaching up and accepting the paw. Tugger pulled him to his feet easily, actually he pulled him a couple of inches off the roof of the car and Quaxo had to kick his legs to get Tugger to realise that he couldn’t reach the ground.

“Oops, sorry,” he said quietly so only Quaxo could here. “Play along ok? Everything will be fine.”

Quaxo stared at him in confusion. If he’d felt exposed before he felt even worse now, even if he was shielded from most of the crowd by Tugger’s body.

“Sorry love I know you wanted to keep it quiet but I can’t deal with this, so.” Tugger said loudly, even though it was clearly directed at Quaxo before he addressed the other two. “This is how I know.” Tugger spun back to Quaxo, and kissed him. 

Quaxo managed a high pitched squeak before Tugger swallowed it and Quaxo mind short circuited. What the hell was Tugger doing? And more importantly, why was he doing it?

Tugger gently tilted his chin up with one paw while the other rested on the panicking tom’s hip. He pulled him in a little as Quaxo whined embarrassingly. Tugger somehow managed to chuckle through the kiss as he deepened it and pried Quaxo’s mouth open.

Quaxo didn’t know when he’d closed his eyes up he had, and his paws were resting lightly on Tugger’s chest so he could feel the shallow rise and fall as he breathed. Quaxo knew nothing but the feel of his lips on his own as the bigger tom licked into him. To say Quaxo shivered would be an understatement; he gave a full body shudder that he was certain Tugger felt.

The Maine coon gave a tiny chuckle as he pulled away. “Easy little one.”

Quaxo was so dumbfounded that he didn’t move, instead he just blinked up at him with overly wide eyes as his body remained rigidly in place.

Tugger twisted to look back over his shoulder and asked loudly, “Believe me now?”

Quaxo face heated up dramatically as he remembered their audience. Tugger squeezed his hip and Quaxo glanced down at the paw with a start.

“Do you get it now?” Tugger asked before turning back around, “He’s not available. Come on Quaxo, let leave them to their stupidity.”

Tugger stepped towards the front of the car, pulling the tuxedo tom along with him as noise erupted behind them. Tugger jumped down off the bonnet before turning to help Quaxo down. For once in his life Quaxo didn’t complain about being helped, too mortified and confused to say anything.

The older tom kept hold of one of his paws as he pulled him along at a fast trot until they were a good distance away from the clearing. He then looked around quickly before ducking into an old trunk and dragging Quaxo in with him.

“Think they brought it?”

Quaxo hit him on the chest as hard as he was capable, which really wasn’t particularly hard. “Brought it?” He asked through his teeth. “I almost brought it myself. How about you warn a tom before you going to do something like that.”

Tugger grinned widely. “What? It worked didn’t it?”

“Did it?” Quaxo asked, sighing as he wiped a paw over his face. “How would we know?”

Tugger gave him a confused frown. “Well from the looks on their faces. Mungojerrie looked like he’d swallowed a lemon.”

“Well I wouldn’t know,” Quaxo huffed, “I didn’t see their faces.”

Tugger gave him a questioning look.

“I’m sorry. I was a bit distracted at the time.”

A slow smile grew across Tugger’s face. “Oh were you?”

Quaxo glared at him but his grin only widened.

“You know, I thought you were just playing the part but you were actually that affected weren’t you? That whine was actually involuntary, and that shudder-”

“Yeah ok, shut up.” Quaxo snapped self-consciously. “No need to rub it in.”

“Hey little one, it’s alright.” Tugger elbowed him gently in the side. “I’d be effected by me too.”

Quaxo opened his mouth but Tugger beat him to it.

“Yeah I know, you hate me.”

Quaxo huffed and crossed his arms over his chest.

“But it definitely worked.” Tugger continued after a minute when Quaxo didn’t reply. “We might have to keep it up for a few days but I’m pretty sure neither of them will try anything again. They’ll be too embarrassed over publicly losing out to me to flirt with anyone for a good long while I should think. Probably a good thing as Mungojerrie’s the sort of tom who’s going to accidently get someone pregnant one day.”

“Pfft, not if he keeps going for tom’s he’s not,” Quaxo quipped, “and what exactly do you mean ‘keep it up?’”

“You know, we’ll have to keep playing the part for at least a few days,” Tugger shrugged, glancing outside to make sure no once was around, “And then you can tell everyone you dumped me because I was too sex crazed or whatever.”

Quaxo gaped at him.

“What?” Tugger asked after a moment as he glanced back at him, “Did you think a once off snog was going to convince them? You’ve got to make them believe we’re actually together or else they’ll think you’ve just got a crush or I’m just playing with you or whatever. Don’t worry, we shouldn’t have to go as far as we just did again. Just spend a little time together in public, maybe a little eye fucking across the clearing, a peck here and there and we should be fine.”

“Oh, just that hu?” Quaxo said sarcastically as he shook his head. “Glad it’s nothing major then.”

“Relax,” Tugger bumped him again, “you won’t even have to act any different. Just let me handle it. You’ll have to be willing to pretend you dumped me however, or else you’ll have Tumble and Mungo there wanting to pick up the pieces.”

“Oh great, so half the junk yards going to hate me, brilliant.”

“Hardly,” Tugger replied as he sat down and leant against the side of the trunk, “they know how I am. I’ll pout about it for a couple of days and maybe even get a couple of pity fucks out of it. Who knows?”

Quaxo let himself collapse onto the floor next to him, curling his legs up underneath himself. “Well I’m glad you’re getting something out of it I suppose.”

Tugger grinned at him. “You mean besides getting to cox those noises out of you? When else am I going to get to hear that?”

Quaxo returned to glaring even as Tugger poked him in the arm.

“And just think, you’ll be the envy of the junkyard for having gotten me to settle for a couple of days, which is more than anyone else has achieved that’s for sure.”

“Are you sure you can keep it between your legs for that long?” Quaxo sniped back. “You sleeping with someone else would certainly give the game away.”

“Oh I think I can manage it.” Tugger purred. “I’m really not as big of a player as everyone thinks I am you know.”

“Yeah sure,” Quaxo sighed, “and it’s totally not displays like that that convince everyone otherwise.”

Tugger shrugged, still smiling smugly as he lent his head back against the wood.

“Well,” Quaxo breathed after a long moment, “I suppose I got a memorable first kiss at least.”

Tugger’s eyes opened and he turned to him with exaggerated slowness. “That was your first kiss?”

Quaxo almost slapped himself in the face at the addition.

“Well no wonder you were so affected,” Tugger sounded a little dazed.

Quaxo groaned in annoyance.

“Hey, hey, don’t worry,” Tugger reached out and laid a paw on his arm, which Quaxo promptly shrugged off. “I wouldn’t have known if you hadn’t said anything. Honestly you should be proud. You’re quite the natural.”

Quaxo glanced up at him, trying to decide if Tugger was making fun of him or not. After seeing Tugger’s oddly earnest look he slowly decided that Tugger was serious and let his crossed arms drop.

“Thank you… I think…” He said uncertainly.

“You’re welcome, anytime you want to practice some more you know where to find me.”

“I hate you.”

* * *

_Quaxo stared across the clearing at the small crowd gathered there. Tugger was at the centre of it. As he always seemed to be these days. It was late winter. The Jellicle ball had been just a couple of days before, and Tugger and Cassandra had been the only kittens who had been considered old enough to go. Now the two of them, but particularly Tugger, were continually hounded by the younger kittens to tell them about it._

_Cassandra had gotten pretty good at making herself disappear whenever the ball came up but Tugger seemed to love the attention. Cass had gone so far as to show up with a collar a couple of days later and had since taken to hiding out at their place so she didn’t get harassed._

_The first couple of times it’d happened he’d tried to drag Quaxo into the middle of it, tried to keep him involved, but Quaxo hated the crowds. He always felt so small in them, and everyone would talk over him or accidently push or step on him. They were loud and chaotic and stressful. No Quaxo much preferred to watch from a distance. Thankfully Tugger seemed to understand._

_The Maine coon caught his eye across the clearing and gave him a little wave before some question from George drew his attention back to the matter at hand. Tugger laughed at something as the crowd eagerly moved in a little closer, blocking the older tom from view._

_Quaxo sighed and moved off, looking around for some place in the sun out of the way were he could take a nap in peace. Quaxo had always been aware that Tugger was the sort of cat to like attention. He was the oldest and so by extension the most popular. And he was Old Deuteronomy’s child, and the new head protector’s little brother. And now he was the only tom kitten at the ball. He’d been there for the mating dance and all the other toms, Tumblebrutus in particular, wanted to know what it was like._

_Quaxo himself had very little interest in mating but Skimble had told him that that was normal at his age, and that when he was older he’d understand what the fuss was about. The older toms certainly seemed fascinated by it. Apparently both Munkustrap and Alonzo had shown interest in Cass at the ball, but she’d stayed with Tugger throughout, too shy to know what to do with the older tom’s attentions._

_There weren’t a lot of queens their age. Cassandra was basically an adult at this point, even if she was still more comfortable around the kittens. Rumpleteazer and Etcetera were the only other female kittens so Quaxo had never really given mating much thought. It all seemed very far away to him. But then he supposed, having to see the mating dance would likely bring it to the forefront of anyone’s mind. Quaxo was just grateful he wasn’t going to have to face that for another year._

_“Alright there?”_

_Quaxo jumped, spinning around to find Cassandra watching him._

_“Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you.” she smiled at him. “You just look a little lost.”_

_Quaxo shrugged, trying to look relaxed as he jumped up beside her._

_“Don’t know what to do without your big shadow hu?”_

_Quaxo gave her a questioning look as he settled down in the sun beside her, thankfully they were out of view of most of the clearing._

_“Tugger, I mean.”_

_“Oh…” Quaxo said inanely, “Most people would call me his shadow, not the other way around.”_

_Cassandra chuckled, “Maybe, but only because they all saw him first.”_

_“Tugger does rather demand attention.”_

_Cassandra gave one of her rare grins. “He does doesn’t he? Even from you.”_

_“He’s my friend…”_

_Cass nodded as she stretched in the weak sunlight. “Only because he forced himself into your life. Everyone knew that the mischief the two of you caused was mostly his fault. You don’t seem like the sort of cat who would think of using Munkustraps knitting needles for spears without someone else egging you on.”_

_“They were Jelly’s needles actually,” Quaxo stated. “Munkustrap doesn’t knit, he crochets.”_

_“Oh,” Cass gave a tiny smile, “yes that seems an important distinction.”_

_“Well, crochet uses a hook rather than needles see?” Quaxo explained, happy to side-track the conversation. “It’d be hard to use a hook as a spear.”_

_Cass raised one elegant eyebrow at him and Quaxo got the distinct impression that she knew precisely what he was doing._

_“But whose idea was it to do so?”_

_Quaxo sighed. “Tugger’s.”_

_“Exactly.”_

_“But I helped.”_

_“Oh I’m sure you probably did most of the work,” Cassandra allowed, “but you would never have done it at all if Tugger hadn’t been there to impress.”_

_“I wasn’t trying to impress him!”_

_“Weren’t you?”_

_“No, he’s my friend. We just like doing things together.”_

_“Hmm, well I suppose this comes back to my original point.” Cassandra hummed. “He followed you around not the other way around. You wouldn’t have been friends at all if he hadn’t insisted on it.”_

_Quaxo wasn’t much liking this conversation at all. He knew Tugger was far too cool to be hanging out with a cat like him, Quaxo wasn’t oblivious to that fact, but he liked to think that Tugger liked him anyway._

_“You seem like the sort of tom who doesn’t mind being alone, even if you do look a little lost without him.” Cass continued, studying him carefully._

_Quaxo shrugged again. “I don’t much like crowds.”_

_“No, I don’t either,” Cassandra agreed, “and Tugger does seem to be rather the opposite.”_

_Quaxo sighed and rested his chin on his front paws. “Seems so.”_

_Cassandra gave him a mildly condescending pat on the shoulder. “Don’t worry. Things will calm down once everyone gets sick of hearing about the ball over and over again. I’m sure he won’t forget about you.”_


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so here it is. I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who has left a kudos or a comment. I read every single one... often more then once... so thank you. I hope you enjoy this. xx.

The next couple of days were odd to say the least. Quaxo’s own behaviour didn’t change much but everyone else’s did. The kittens were suddenly fascinated by him. Victoria and Etcetera both demanded pointers on how to get a mate, and Pouncivil and Plato both suddenly started treating him like a god. It was all very frustrating considering he’d only done this in order to stop getting attention from Tumbe and Mungo.

Tumblebrutus himself had been very apologetic. He’d cornered Quaxo first thing in the morning when hem had been on his way out to hunt and had begged his forgiveness, swearing black and blue that he didn’t know he and Tugger had something going on. Quaxo had waved the apology away, fighting back the urge to apologise himself for their subterfuge. He only calmed down after Quaxo had made up some bullshit story about them trying to keep it quiet because of Quaxo’s aversion to attention.

Mungojerrie on the other hand took completely the opposite approach. He pretended nothing had ever happened. He didn’t say a word to Quaxo about it, and simply acted like he’d never had any interest in Quaxo what’s so ever. Quaxo didn’t mind. In fact Quaxo considered this the best case scenario.

Quaxo continued on with his normal routine, not really sure what else he was supposed to do. Tugger had said to leave it to him and while Quaxo hated being out of the loop there wasn’t much else he could do. The lying oddly didn’t bother him as much as he thought it would, well except for with Plato and Victoria who were just so trusting that Quaxo couldn’t help but feel bad about it.

Tugger gave Quaxo the first taste of what he was in for around noon. Tugger swaggered into the clearing surrounded by his usual gaggle of cats and spotted him instantly. Quaxo was perched in his favourite hiding spot within the pipe. It wasn’t a particularly nice day and there was no sun to speak of so Quaxo didn’t feel like he was missing out by curling up in there.

Tugger grinned at him before saying something to his crew and then striding across the clearing towards him. He dropped down onto all fours just in front of him and crawled in close so his body would be blocking them from view.

“Felt the need to hide this morning did you?” Tugger asked quickly, sticking his head right in front of Quaxo’s. “Don’t worry. I told them not to follow me over and I won’t bother you for long. Just got to make it look like we’re besotted.”

Quaxo rolled his eyes but didn’t draw away. “Besotted hu?”

“Well now that the cats out of the bag, you know,” Tugger grinned, “make it look like I want to show you off.”

“Pfft, you just want to show off full stop, got nothing to do with me.”

Tugger tilted his head to one side. “Hey, I got the tom everyone else wanted so I think I deserve to be able to show off a little.”

“Except you didn’t actually get me.” Quaxo pointed out.

Tugger shrugged, “Yeah but they don’t know that.”

Quaxo rolled his eyes as Tugger began to draw away. “You’re such a bore.”

Tugger’s grin only widened, “Yeah but you love me.” He said loudly, so half the clearing heard.

Quaxo felt his face heat up. “Yeah, whatever,” he managed inanely.

Tugger suddenly slipped back in close and pecked him on the lips quickly before springing back to his feet and strutting back to his admirers. Quaxo tried to keep his face blank but he wasn’t sure he succeeded.

It was just so odd, having Tugger give such easy physically affection after Quaxo had been imagining it for so long. It left him feeling a little tingly to say the least.

He couldn’t help but watch him as the crowd swarmed in around him. Jemima, who Quaxo really thought was too little to be thinking about such things, was bouncing on her toes beside Tugger and nattering animatedly. Even Alonzo, who didn’t normally get involved, was there.

Tugger was obviously giving some sort of smug speech as he kept glancing back over at Quaxo. At one point he gave him an exaggerated wink and Quaxo couldn’t help but shake his head in mild amusement at how easily Tugger did this.

“Told you he wouldn’t forget about you.”

Quaxo glanced up to find Cassandra sitting poised atop the pipe. “What?”

“When you were little and Tugger was getting all popular.” Cassandra explained, still watching Tugger’s group. “You were looking all fore lone because he wasn’t spending as much time with you. I told you he wouldn’t forget about you.”

“If you’d told kitten me that this was what I was in for I’m not sure I would have thanked you,” Quaxo said dryly.

Cass gave a tiny laugh as she slid down off of the pipe and sat down gracefully beside him. “No, you probably wouldn’t have, but you seem to be enjoying it now.”

Quaxo tried not to look alarmed.

“I’m glad he finally figured his shit out.” She continued without pause.

“What shit?” Quaxo asked in confusion.

“His shit.” Cassandra reiterated with a dismissive wave of the paw. “You know, how he’s been drooling after you ever since he saw you dance at the ball and realised that he wanted to fuck you.”

“What?!” Quaxo exclaimed at a pitch that Jemima would be jealous of.

Cassandra gave him a questioning look. “You didn’t realise? I assumed you’d noticed and that was how you’d got together.”

Quaxo was feeling more and more out of his depth as this conversation went along. He didn’t know how to reply. What if Tugger had told the story of them getting together and it didn’t match to whatever Quaxo said. How did this all end up so complicated?

“No it just… sort of happened.”

Cassandra hummed thoughtfully. “Well he was always smitten with you, but I don’t think he realised what it actually was until the ball.”

Quaxo gazed back across the clearing to when Tugger was now making himself comfortable in front of the nursery and teasing Victoria and Jemima with his tail as he spoke to George and Bombalurina.

“It’s not an unusual occurrence.” Cassandra was saying. “It happened to me too when I attended my first ball. Suddenly I had three different cats interested so I understand if you were a bit overwhelmed.”

“How did you deal with it?” Quaxo asked. “Having more than one cat after you?”

“Well at the ball Tugger was actually a huge help,” Cass explained as she licked a paw and ran it over her ears. “He made it seem like we were together so everyone else left me alone. And then shortly after that my humans took me to the vet and I haven’t had to deal with a heat since, which also helped. Less toms are interested if there is no chance of kittens.”

“Well I’m male so there was no chance of kittens anyway.” Quaxo pointed out, even as he breathed a sigh of relief knowing that Tugger had done this whole fake relationship thing before and it had never gotten out.

“No, but you were in a very male heavy year of kittens,” Cassandra said thoughtfully. “Just wait until this year’s kits are old enough to attend the ball, and watch all you’re old den mates suddenly realise that they’re adults.”

“I’m not sure I want to think about Electra or Jemima being adults quite yet.”

Cass gave him another of her serene smiles before looking back to Tugger and his crew. “I’m glad he’s happy,” she said after a short silence, “that you both are. Try not to worry too much. He’s not as big of a Lothario as he makes out.”

Cassandra stood up and padded away silently, leaving Quaxo even more befuddled then he had been before.

* * *

_Quaxo couldn’t take his eyes off the pair, and he wasn’t the only one._

_Tugger was laid draped across some old crates, half propped up against one as his leg dangled over the side of another. The bright clear sunlight danced over legs that the tom had finally grown into and a mane which no longer looked scraggly._

_But it wasn’t his sudden growth spurt that had everyone’s attention. It was the dark queen literally perched atop him. Her name was Exotica and she’d only appeared a couple of days earlier. She was a pure bred Siamese and looked it. All long slender limbs and graceful proportions. Quaxo would have killed to look like her._

_Most of the junkyard was staring too. Exotica had seemed rather shy when she’d first arrived. Cassandra said that she’d been cast out by her owner for not having the correct colouring or something. Quaxo couldn’t understand that at all, because she was the prettiest cat he’d ever seen, which was saying a lot considering he’d grown up with Cassandra. But Cass said Exotica was lucky to have not been ‘disposed of’. Quaxo didn’t know what that meant but it sounded bad._

_Tugger had his paws resting easily on her hips as she threw back her head and laughed at something he’d said. Quaxo couldn’t help but stare at that slender neck as she did so. Tugger grinned charmingly up at her._

_Quaxo didn’t know what his stomach was doing but he didn’t like it._

_Rumpleteazer, who was sitting next to him and was as riveted as he was, grumbled loudly. “What’s she got that the rest of us don’t?”_

_“What hasn’t she got that we don’t?” Quaxo replied absently._

_Rumple managed to pull her eyes away long enough to glance at the tuxedo tom. She elbowed him, harder then was really necessary._

_“Are you jealous of him or her?” She asked cynically._

_“Both,” Quaxo breathed as Tugger leant forward for a kiss from the dark queen. “Definitely both.”_

* * *

It continued like that for a couple of days. Quaxo would go about his business as usual and at some point in the day, usually during his afternoon nap, Tugger would appear. The Maine coon would find him on the car, or the tire, or the pipe, and come trotting over to him with a dopey, smug smile on his face. He’d make some quip or dumb remark before going in for a kiss. He’d then go back to his fan club and about his usual schedule.

On that particular day Quaxo had been back atop the car, this time with little Victoria who had hurt an ankle and wasn’t able to play with the other kits. Tugger had shown up just before noon with the usual group in tow. Except this time he had a dead squirrel hanging from his front paws.

His eyes lit up dramatically when he saw Quaxo, making the smaller tom suppress an amused smile. Tugger said something to Tumblebrutus before leaving the group and coming over to them. Victoria started batting him on the shoulder insistently as if he couldn’t see Tugger coming. Tugger slid up onto the boot so his head was at the same height as Quaxo’s where he was laying on the roof. 

“Hello Beautifuls.” Tugger purred, making Victoria beside him squeak excitedly. “How are you enjoying this fine afternoon?”

Quaxo rolled his eyes as Victoria started going at a million miles an hour. Tugger listened patiently, nodding politely whenever she drew breath, and smiling the whole while.

“Well,” Tugger said when she eventually ran out of stream, “I thought I’d bring you both some lunch.” He held the squirrel up for them to view. “Seeing as I have a bad habit of always stealing Quaxo’s food. I don’t know how you feel about squirrel, if you want something else I can try to get that instead. It might take a little while though, so if-”

“Tugger,” Quaxo cut him off, “squirrel’s fine. Good even.”

“Yeah?” Tugger’s face lit up happily and Quaxo’s insides did an uncomfortable flip.

Quaxo nodded silently and Tugger carefully laid the dead creature out in front of the pair.

“Good, good,” Tugger said quickly, “well I’d better leave you to it. Don’t want to take too much time out of your day. I’ll just be over there. If you need me for anything.”

Tugger lent in quickly for their usual parting peck and maybe Quaxo let it linger a little longer than normal but Tugger didn’t complain. Tugger gave him a wide grin before sliding down off the car. He’d only taken a couple of steps away before he was suddenly spinning back around and bouncing back up onto the boot. His front paws holding him up as his back paws dangled.

It took Quaxo a minute to realise what was happening as Tugger lent in for another kiss. Quaxo instinctively shoved him away with a paw to the face. Tugger dropped back to his paws on the ground and shook himself. He blinked for a moment before giving Quaxo an exaggerated pout. Quaxo, having now recovered from the surprise, gave him a long suffering shake of the head.

Tugger continued to give him the sort of eyes you’d expect on a baby pollicle for a moment before morphing back into his usual self and strutting back over to his posse.

Victoria was staring at Quaxo as if he’d just killed a kitten. Quaxo ignored her and started skinning the squirrel. He didn’t normally eat at lunch time, usually just having something when he first got up and before he went to bed, but he wasn’t about to reject the gift. Especially seeing as they were supposed to be playing at happy families, and frankly Quaxo would eat almost anything.

He pulled a leg off for Victoria as he watched the rest of the cats around the yard and chewed on his own. He was less than halfway through when he realised that there was no chance the two of them were going to be able to eat the whole thing. The squirrel would be a big meal for two full grown cats but Victoria was still only half onto solids and Quaxo had eaten that morning. There was however no way he was letting it go to waste, particularly considering it was a gift.

Quaxo pressed his lips together before looking around the clearing. If Cassandra or Plato were nearby they’d be the perfect solution, however neither of them seemed to be in the clearing at present and on second thoughts it would seem weird to offer a present from Tugger to one of them.

There really was only one option, or at least that was what Quaxo was going to tell himself as he put down the bone he was chewing on and slid forward off the car.

“I’ll be right back.” Quaxo said to Victoria before turning and jogging across the clearing.

He’d never waded into Tugger’s fan club before. In fact he’d always tried to avoid it as much as possible but these weren’t the usual circumstances. He had to push, the cats were packed so tightly in around the Maine coon, but then Rumpleteazers eyes landed on him.

Within seconds the calico queen had screeched for silence and was shoving a path through the cats for him. Once the crowd realised who it was they parted like the red sea, leaving Quaxo feeling much more exposed then he’d expected to in this situation.

Tugger, who was draped out across the dirt on his back, came into view looking rather startled to see him.

“Quaxo? What is it? What’s wrong?” Tuger had half risen to his feet before Quaxo even got a chance to speak.

“Nothing!” He said quickly, holding his paws out palm down to calm him. “Nothing’s wrong. Relax.”

Tugger stilled before slowly settling back into a seated position, even if it was somewhat more upright then it was before. “Then what brings you into my little community?”

Quaxo would have rolled his eyes if he wasn’t already so nervous. “Ah… well… I just realised that, um, there is no way Victoria and I are going to finish that squirrel. What with her not being entirely onto solid food yet, and well… it’s rather a large squirrel.”

“Oh…” Tugger said, sounding oddly uncertain, “Is it too much? I can take the left over to someone else…”

“Well… no, I was just wondering if you might want some?” Quaxo blurted all at once. “But then you’ve probably already eaten. Haven’t you? Never mind, I’ll ask-”

A large paw on the arm stopped him from turning back towards the car. “No, of course. I’d love to have some.”

Quaxo breathed a long sigh of relief. “Oh good.” He managed, as Tugger stared to guide him out of the crowd. “I mean… you caught it after all. Seems only right that you get to eat some of it.”

Tugger smiled down at him before calling over his shoulder to everyone else. “You guys can manage without me for a while can’t you? My mate needs me.”

Quaxo desperately attempted to prevent any reaction from showing on his face but at the very least it heated up to about the same temperature as the sun. He did however manage to keep his steps from faltering as they walked back over to the car.

Quaxo didn’t comment as Tugger placed his paws on Quaxo’s hips and lifted him up onto the car, even though he could have easily gotten up himself. Tugger followed him up as Quaxo resettled himself down next to a wide eyed Victoria.

Tugger studied them from a standing position for a minute.

Quaxo glanced up at him. “Are you going to sit down?”

“I’m just deciding exactly how I want to sit,” Tugger said thoughtfully.

“Oh yes, you’re right. That’s a very important question.” Quaxo scoffed, more relaxed now that the only person within hearing distance was Victoria.

“Tis,” Tugger replied simply before sitting so he could lean back against the pile of junk to one side of the car. “See, if I’d sat over there I couldn’t do this.”

Quaxo froze as Tugger picked him up and deposited him in his own lap. Quaxo didn’t make any embarrassing noises this time but it was a near thing.

Instead he hissed, “What on earth are you doing?” Quaxo twisted so he could see Tugger’s ridiculous grin.

“I’m cuddling my mate. What else?” Tugger ran his paws up Quaxo’s back and the smaller tom barely supressed a shiver.

Quaxo glanced at Victoria who was very clearly only pretending not to watch. “Don’t you think you’re taking this a little far?” He hissed as quietly as he could manage.

“Not really,” Tugger said, wrapping his arms around his waist and pulling him back against his chest. “Now, how about some of that squirrel.”

Quaxo rolled his eyes as Tugger sat his chin on Quaxo's shoulder and silently reached for the squirrel.

“Don’t suppose you want to feed me some so I don’t have to take my paws off of you?” Tugger said while spreading said paws out over Quaxo’s stomach to emphasize his point.

“Not unless you want a very public breakup.” Quaxo hissed through his teeth.

Tugger chuckled but accepted the hunk of meat handed to him before leaning back against the rubbish pile. Quaxo tried to stay as still as possible. He didn’t want to move, not when half the junkyard was watching them, but it was hard to focus on anything else while in The Rum Tum Tugger’s lap. A situation that he was sure Tugger was well aware of. 

Sometime later Tugger pulled him back into his chest again, so Quaxo was half laying again him. “Relax little one. I’m not going to bite you.”

“Sure you’re not.” Quaxo sighed, too pent up to think of anything smart to say.

“Do you want me to go?” He asked, running a paw up over Quaxo hip.

“Shut up and eat your food.” Quaxo replied quickly, shoving another piece of meat into his paw.

“Yes sir.”

They ate in silence for a while, until Victoria spotted Plato across the clearing and used it as an excuse to make her escape.

“See,” Quaxo huffed as she disappeared, “even she found it too awkward to hang around.

“That’s ok.” Tugger replied cheerfully, “I prefer having you all to myself anyway.”

Quaxo rolled his eyes. “You can drop the act now, Tugger. There’s no one close enough to hear what we’re saying.”

“Pfft, who said I’m acting.” Tugger purred into his ear.

Quaxo huffed and went to sit up, only Tugger didn’t relinquish his hold.

“No stay. You used to love cuddling.”

“And you used to hate it.”

“Nah,” Tugger replied with a grin as Quaxo relaxed back into him. “Just thought I was meant to dislike it casue all the other toms my age did, and because hating it really upset Munkustrap which was basically my goal in life at the time.”

Quaxo snorted. “As opposed to now when getting laid is your goal in life?”

“Well…” Tugger said slowly, “it’s not my goal right this minute. If it was I wouldn’t be pretending to be in a relationship with you. It’d be a bit counterproductive don’t you think?”

Quaxo couldn’t argue with that as he lent his head back against Tugger’s shoulder. “True enough I suppose.”

Tugger hummed and wrapped his arms back around Quaxo so each of his paws was resting on the opposite shoulder. “This is nice though.”

“Careful,” Quaxo said around a yawn, “you’ll ruin your reputation.”

Tugger chuckled lightly as Quaxo’s eyes drifted closed. “Worth it I recon.”

* * *

_"Tugger!” Quaxo hissed, pushing against the older tom’s shoulder with both of his front paws. “Why aren’t you up yet? It’s almost midday!”_

_Tugger yawned before slowly blinking open his eyes. “I’m tired Quaxo. Go play with Pouncivil or something.”_

_“But he’s too small to really play. And I want to practice some magic.” Quaxo whined, leaning his weight against the Maine coon._

_“Then get Tumble to watch you.”_

_“But we haven’t hung out in days!” Quaxo complained. He knew he was being annoying. He knew Tugger wanted him to go away so he could sleep but Quaxo just couldn’t do it._

_“I was up half the night Quaxo.”_

_Quaxo frowned. “Why?”_

_Tugger gave him a sleepy smirk. “Let’s just say I wasn’t in here alone most of the night.”_

_“Well of course you weren’t,” Quaxo said in confusion, “you share with your brother.”_

_“That wasn’t what I meant,” Tugger said with a sigh, “he was on guard duty last night. I was in here with someone else. Someone who kept me up most of the night. You understand?”_

_Quaxo shook his head slowly, utterly confused._

_Tugger let out another long slow breath. “You’ll understand when you’re older, but for now I need my sleep, in case she keeps me up again tonight. I promise we’ll hang out later, just go and bug George or someone now ok?”_

_Quaxo bit his lip. Trying hard not to feel rejected. Again._

_“Or Cass if you want to practise your magic. She’ll help.”_

_Quaxo desperately tried to stop his lip from wobbling as he turned to go. “"Anyone would be more help then you have been recently!”_

_The ground disappeared beneath the tuxedo tom’s paws as he fled. He didn’t know if it was because he was moving so fast or if he just couldn't see through the tears._

* * *

Quaxo blinked open his eyes slowly, squinting against the setting sun which was now shining directly into his face.

“Have a nice snooze?” Tugger whispered into his ear, making him jump as he remembered where he was.

“Why didn’t you wake me?” Quaxo asked, looking around as he tried to orientate himself.

“Should I have?” Tugger inquired, tilting his head to look down at Quaxo who was still using his chest as a pillow.

“Yes!”

“Why?”

Quaxo pushed himself up more so he was at least sitting up. “Because…”

Tugger raised his eyebrows at him when no more explanation was forthcoming. “I couldn’t see any good reason to wake you up. After all, you usually nap through most of the afternoon.”

“I kept you from doing whatever it is you usually do.” Quaxo said apologetically.

“Oh I don’t mind,” Tugger said with a shrug, “it’ll give all of them something to talk about. As long as I’m getting attention I don’t really mind where it comes from.”

“But I was asleep,” Quaxo stated the obvious, “I wasn’t giving you any attention.”

“Everyone else was, trust me.” Tugger grinned widely at him. “Seriously Quaxo relax. I really don’t mind.”

Quaxo turned sideways so he could see Tugger’s face and make sure he wasn’t just lying to be nice. “You’re sure?”

Tugger gave him one of his rare genuinely soft smiles. “Would I ever lie to you?”

“Cass told me what you did for her.” He blurted suddenly.

Tugger frowned. “Oh? Did you… Did you tell her about us?”

Quaxo shook his head. “No, she thinks we’re together as much as everyone else does. Just… It’s good to know you’ve done this before, is all.”

Tugger shrugged, looking down and fiddling with his mane. “Well it was different with Cass. It was as much for my benefit as it was for hers.”

“What do you mean?”

Tugger looked up at him before answering slowly. “Well… everyone was suddenly interested in me too. You know? Like I enjoyed the attention but I wasn’t quite ready for the sex bit. So really Cass was helping me as much as I was helping her. I didn’t want sex from someone until moons later, when-”

“Exotica came along.”

Tugger gave a small smile and nodded slowly. “Yeah, exactly.”

“She is very pretty.”

“She is.”

“Too bad she spends most of her time with her humans now.”

Tugger shrugged. “Not really. She’s happy. And she always visits for the ball.”

“Yeah but you and her-”

Tugger laughed, “Quaxo… little one, we were never going to work long term. I mean it was fun while it lasted or whatever but you know.”

“Oh,” Quaxo said unintelligently, “so you don’t… was there ever anyone else?”

“Are you asking me who in the junk yard I’ve slept with?” Tugger asked with a cheeky grin.

“No!” Quaxo smacked him lightly on the shoulder.

“Then what exactly where you asking?”

“Well…” Quaxo thought about it for a moment, wonder the same question himself. “I guess I was asking if there was ever anyone… you thought of as… well… more than just a sexual partner.”

Tugger gave him an unreadable look. “There is.”

“Is… not was…”

Tugger gave a slow nod.

“Can I ask who?” Quaxo inquired carefully. “And why you’re not already with them?”

Tugger lifted one shoulder half-heartedly, “It was never the right time I guess.”

“Oh,” Quaxo said inanely, not missing the fact that he hadn’t answered the first question but also not willing to pry.

“Yeah. Oh.”

“Tugger!”

Quaxo stat up straight with a start before spinning on the other tom’s lap to find Munkustrap standing at the foot of the boot.

“What’s up Munk?” Tugger asked, leaning forward to see his brother better while keeping a warm paw on Quaxo’s lower back.

“I’m on duty again tonight so the den’s all yours.” Munk explained, already starting to walk backwards away from them. “Try not to stink it up too much.”

Tugger laughed easily as Munkustrap smiled at him before spinning around to walk off.

“No promises!” Tugger called after him.

Quaxo gave him an alarmed look.

“Oh don’t worry. Munk’s too polite to ask why we didn’t fuck.” Tugger reassured him. “You can just come sleep in there for the night. He’ll be the only one that knows we’re not actually mating, and he won’t say anything. I try not to use our den for that anyway. Makes keeping the peace easier.”

“You don’t mind sharing for the night?”

“Of course not,” Tugger looked confused at the question. “I literally just let you sleep most of the afternoon away on top of me. Think I would have done that if I minded?”

Quaxo scratched at one of his ears awkwardly. “I suppose not.”

“Exactly. Now, do you want any more of this squirrel before we go to bed?” Tugger asked, pulling what was left of the squirrel towards them by its tail.

They ate quickly and quietly as most of the cats started heading off to bed around them. Or in the case of Jennyanydots, waking up. A few of them called goodnights, but none tried to approach them.

Quaxo was incredibly grateful. He was still feeling sleepy from his nap and his brain didn’t seem to be working as well as he would have liked. Considering their current ruse any conversation with another cat right required him to be on the ball so he didn’t slip up and give the game away trying to converse with another cat at that moment would likely lead to disaster.

“Done?” Tugger asked when Quaxo’s eating slowed.

“Yeah, I suppose.”

“Good.” Tugger stood up. “I’ll get rid of this.”

Tugger carried the carcass away quickly, leaving Quaxo alone on the cooling roof of the car. He was left feeling strangely exposed, in the sort of way he usually only did when he found himself the centre of attention in a large crowd. He wanted Tugger to come back so he could curl up and go back to sleep; hide from the world in his mane.

Thankfully the Maine coon didn’t take long. He was back moments later, leaping up onto the car and reaching down to help Quaxo up.

“Are you feeling alright?” Tugger asked as he drew Quaxo to his feet.

“Yes? Why?” Quaxo asked in confusion as they crossed to the tire.

“Well, it’s just you haven’t insisted on doing everything yourself like you usually do.” Tugger explained before hopping forward to hold the curtain back from the entrance of his den for him.

Quaxo climbed up into the den, using that as an excuse to take a moment to think about why that was. Once Tugger was inside, and he’d let the curtain fall shut, Quaxo replied. “Well we’re meant to be in a relationship right? Cats in relationships do stuff for each other. Although I suppose I haven’t really done anything for you.”

“You invited me to eat with you.” Tugger pointed out quickly. “and you let me kiss you in public even though it makes you feel awkward, and you let me spend the whole afternoon with you.”

“None of those are really doing things for you though…”

“Well no, but it depends on how you look at it.” Tugger explained as he led Quaxo over to his overly extravagant bed, “Different cats show affection in different ways. I like doing stuff for people. You like spending time with them. They’re both completely valid. It might not feel like much to you, but it means a lot to me.”

Quaxo frowned, confused as to why Tugger was taking this whole thing so seriously.

“So is that why you’re not insisting on doing everything yourself?” Tugger asked as he jumped up onto his bed and then turned to face him. “Because you think you have to accept help from me in public?”

“I don’t know…” Quaxo scratched at his ear, “I guess… I guess it doesn’t seem as hard to accept help from someone who’s expected to help. You know, like a mate is always going to want to help so not allowing them is almost mean in and of itself. I’d want my mate to let me help them.”

Tugger gave him this strange little conflicted smile before reaching out a paw and inviting him up and onto the bed. “Do you still sleep curled up in a tiny little ball?” Tugger asked jokingly.

“Maybe,” Quaxo said back as he carefully settled down onto the blankets which smelt almost as strongly of Tugger as he did himself. “Do you still take up the whole bed and steal all the blankets?”

Tugger grinned widely. “I do, but I’ll try to contain myself for your sake.”

“How very kind of you.”

“Well, you see, someone once told me that mates do things for each other.”

Quaxo rolled his eyes in amusement as he settled down on his side, curling his legs up in front of him and looking up at the larger tom. “Too bad we’re not actually together then, hu?”

“Yeah,” Tugger patted over his ears, “too bad.”

Quaxo tried not to read into that, he really did.

“You know I always want to do things for you right?” Tugger asked after a moment. “I mean… you said you’d let your mate do it because they’re always going to want to, but I’m always going to want to with you too. So why don’t you just let me?”

Quaxo glanced up at him where he was laying on his back with his paws resting on his stomach. “I thought the entire reason for this conversation was because I was letting you.”

“Yeah but only because we’re pretending to be together,” Tugger said, suddenly rolling onto his side to look at him. “But will you continue to let me? Even when we’re no longer pretending? Cause I don’t want to stop doing things for you.”

“Why though?” Quaxo asked in confusion as Tugger picked at one of the blankets.

“I don’t know. I just like helping,” Tugger mumbled, “makes me feel… I don’t know… needed. And before you say anything I’m well aware that you don’t actually need me.”

Quaxo chewed on his lip as he thought about that. “I think it depend on what it is. I mean if it’s something I can obviously do for myself, like today with the squirrel or holding the curtain or whatever. Then it doesn’t seem so hard to accept because everyone knows I could do it for myself. It’s when it’s something actually difficult that I feel the need to prove myself.”

“Oh! So small things are ok?” Tugger brightened, “I can do little.”

“And if there’s no audience,” Quaxo added quickly, “that helps too, with the bigger things I mean.”

“So you find it harder to accept help when you think it’ll make you look incapable.” Tugger extrapolated.

“Well… yeah I suppose.”

“Ok, ok good. I can work with that.” Tugger looked thoroughly pleased with this information as he rolled back onto his back.

Quaxo yawned again, wriggling forward a little so he could nose at Tugger’s mane. Tugger held an arm out invitingly so Quaxo could tuck himself against it.

“I missed you Tugger,” Quaxo mumbled, as he started to drift off again.

“Missed me?” Tugger asked, looking down at him. “I didn’t go anywhere.”

“Yeah but you kind of did though.” Quaxo replied without opening his eyes. “At least… you drifted away from me.”

Tugger sighed, patting at Quaxo’s ears again. “Yeah I know, I’m sorry. It was just… you never seemed to like the crowds and I always attracted them, so I didn’t want to drag you into something you were uncomfortable with. And I knew the older toms treated you like a hanger on, and that that annoyed you. And then-”

“And then there was Exotica, and you wanted to sleep all the time.” Quaxo finished for him.

Tugger chuckled slightly, “Yeah. I guess you’ve figured out why now.”

“Apparently fucking takes a lot of energy.”

Tugger laughed properly this time. “Only apparently?”

Quaxo peaked open one eye. “If I hadn’t hadn't kiss anyone until a couple of days ago why on earth would I know anything about sex?”

“Oh, oh right.” Tugger shook his head. “Sorry. I didn’t think.”

“How unusual for you,” Quaxo said sarcastically.

“Hey, I think all the time thank you very much,” Tugger said poking him in the ribs, “perhaps not about the most intelligent of things but still.”

Quaxo squirmed away from his paw and straight into his chest. “You’ll have to find something else to think about then.”

“So thinking about something smart will make me intelligent?”

Quaxo snorted. “That’s rather convoluted logic, but ok.”

“Well then,” Tugger agreed, “I should be the smartest cat in the junkyard.”

“Oh yes? And why is that?” Quaxo asked in amusement.

“Because you’re the smartest cat I know and I think about you all the time.”

“What?”

“You heard me.”

“Tugger…”

“Quaxo.”

Quaxo didn’t know what to say. Or to do. Or to think. In all honest he was having trouble just breathing never lone anything else.

“When Munk said he wasn’t going to be in here tonight I was going to take the chance to ask how you wanted to go about ending this,” Tugger said slowly, stroking down Quaxo’s back soothingly, “but frankly I’d actually prefer we didn’t.”

Quaxo’s mouth was open but there were certainly no words coming out.

“Quaxo?” Tugger asked, shifting carefully onto his side so Quaxo’s head was pillowed on his arm rather than his chest. “Please say something?”

“Cassandrasaidyouwantedtofuckme.” Quaxo blurted, eyes going wide as he registered what he’d said.

Tugger let out a long slow breath. “Cassandra… is right… as usual.”

“Well there are bloody simpler ways of going about it!” Quaxo exclaimed hysterically, sitting up suddenly in a desperate attempt to make breathing easier.

Tugger sat up himself, rubbing Quaxo’s back nervously. “Hey, hey, it’s ok. Just breathe.”

“Breath? You want me to breath!?” Quaxo squawked, arms flailing.

“Waoh,” Tugger ducked away as Quaxo twisted towards him, “hey, please don’t yell. I’m right here. If you need to hit me or something go for it. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“Shouldn’t have…?” Quaxo’s vision swam as he sucked in another breath. “Bit late to back out now, Tugger.”

“You’re right of course.” Tugger agreed, carefully placing a paw between the other tom’s shoulder blades as he calmed. “And if you want to fake the break up now and never talk to me again, I’ll understand.”

Quaxo glanced over his shoulder at him, still breathing heavily. “And why on earth would I want to do that?”

Tugger frowned, mouth opening and closing a couple of times before he managed to get words out. “Well… if I’ve made you uncomfortable or... whatever.”

“No, no,” Quaxo breathed, tail flicking in agitation “I’m ok... you just startled me is all. But it’s just sex. Sex is ok. I can do sex. Well… no I probably can’t do sex, but I can deal with you wanting that. This is fine. I’m fine.”

“Are you?” Tugger asked in concern, shifting closer and wrapping one arm carefully around the still seated tom. “You sure? I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have just dropped that on you like that. It’s just I’ve been trying to scope out if you might be ready for that for a while now.”

Quaxo twisted his neck to look at Tugger, who was still mostly behind him. “Ready for that? What? To have sex with you? So you’ve just been waiting for me to grow up enough to have sex with?”

“What? No!”

“Oh good.” Quaxo nodded sarcastically, eyes wide as he stared at absolutely nothing. “Because that would be creepy.”

“Look,” Tugger dragged both paws down over his face in frustration, “I didn’t even realise that I thought about you that way until I saw you at the ball. I mean I’ve always wanted to be close to you but it didn’t click in exactly what was going on until then.”

“Always wanted to be close?” Quaxo let out. “You’ve got a weird way of showing it.”

Tugger closed his eyes for a moment before opening them slowly and turning so he was fully facing the other tom, taking one of his paws in his own. “I know, but I didn’t want to rush you into growing up and I was only young myself. I certainly didn’t know what I was doing. And then I saw you at the ball and realised how I felt about you and… well it suddenly became much harder to ignore.”

“Tugger, it’s been moons since the ball.” Quaxo huffed, whiskers twitching.

“I know,” Tugger sighed, patting over the back of Quaxo’s paw with his own free one, “but I remembered how overwhelmed I was after my first ball, and I told you I wasn’t ready for sex at that point. And you’re rather a lot shyer then I am so I thought there was a pretty good chance you’d take longer to get there then I did. And I suppose I’ve just been trying to figure out how you might feel about it all since then?”

Quaxo looked up suddenly as something clicked. “This is why you suddenly came up to me that one time and asked me if I was interested in Plato. Isn’t it?”

Tugger nodded slowly. “It is. I was trying to find out if you might have your eye on someone, or if someone else might be after you. I didn’t want to step on anyone paws, but you said you didn’t so…”

“That was still almost a moon ago.”

“Well just because you weren’t after anyone yourself didn’t mean that you wanted that sort of attention.” Tugger explained, words coming quicker now. “You didn’t mate with anyone during the mating dance after all and then I saw how uncomfortable you were about Tumble and Mungo’s attentions, and I just… I had to come see if you were ok. That’s why I asked if you might be like Cassandra, and not like sex at all.”

“So if I said I wasn’t you would have left me alone?” Quaxo stared at him, trying hard to keep his voice stable.

“Yes. No. I mean, I would never have brought up sex,” Tugger stumbled over his words as he tried to explain. “Not if it was something you were uncomfortable with, or didn’t want. But you’re still…” Tugger stopped to swallow, “you’re still you. I’d still want… there to be something between us, and these last couple of days…”

“Wait,” Quaxo said quietly, “you… what do you mean ‘something between us’? What something? If you don’t mean sex?”

Tugger frowned, looking up from their paws into the tuxedo tom’s face. “There’s more to a relationship then sex Quaxo. Even I know that. You… I know everyone thinks I’m a sex crazy delinquent or whatever but… I never felt about any of them the way I feel about you and if-”

“Tugger.”

The Maine coon stopped.

“What do you mean?” Quaxo articulated very slowly, “‘How you feel about me?’”

Tugger’s frown deepened, fear creeping into his face. “What do I mean? You… I… Quaxo… Little one… I love you.”

Quaxo was back to not being able to breath.

“Quaxo?”

Quaxo’s arms flailed, searching desperately for something to ground him. He managed to grab one of Tugger’s shoulders as he lent forward, head going down as he sucked much needed air into his screaming lungs.

“Hey, hey, hey. It’s alright, I’ve got you.” Tugger grabbed his other paw before wrapping his arm around his shoulders to rub at Quaxo’s back. “Please breathe love. You’re scaring me.”

“I’m scaring _you_?” Quaxo gasped, not rising from his folded over position.

“Yes!” Tugger exclaimed back, whiskers trembling. “I’ve never had a cat start hyperventilating when I told them how I feel before. Course… I’ve never actually told anyone how I feel before so maybe this is normal and I just don’t have anything to compare it to.”

Quaxo let out a disbelieving laugh, head tilting up to look at him even as he stayed in his leant forward position over Tugger’s folded legs. “You’re insane.”

Tugger shrugged, unable to really argue with that. “Yeah, probably.”

Tugger continued to rub at his back as Quaxo tried to focus. Focus on something that wasn’t Tugger’s admission, unlikely as it was. Or the feel of his breath on his ears. Or the soothing paw running up and down his spine. Or his own desperate hope that this might actually all be real.

Eventually, slowly, he calmed, as he realised that he must have misunderstood something. Tugger meant as a friend. That he loved him as a friend. And that he wanted them to have a relationship in a platonic sort of way. That if sex couldn’t be involved they’d just be good friends, no way would the Rum Tum Tugger give up sex to have a purely romantic relationship with him.

As his breathing evened back out Quaxo was able to sit up slowly, paw sliding off Tugger’s shoulder as he slowly met the Maine coon’s concerned look.

“I’m fine.”

“Are you?” Tugger asked, refusing to let go of his other paw. “I’m sure Jenny could give you something if you think you’re having a panic attack or something…”

Quaxo shook his head. “No I’m alright. Just… I just got a little carried away for a moment. I’ll be ok.”

Tugger continued to gaze at him worriedly. “Can I… can I ask what it is about what I said that scared you so much?”

Quaxo glanced up, pressing his lips together as he decided on what would be best to say. “I’m sorry, I was just being silly. Of course you love me, we’re friends, and have been since we were kits. It’s only normal that-”

“Quaxo, that’s not how I meant it.” Tugger cut him off. “I don’t want to go frightening you again, but I most certainly didn’t mean that I loved you as a friend. It might have started like that when we were kits but I think it might have been romantic then too… I don’t know.”

Quaxo stared at him. For a long time. And just when he thought he might have digested that he stared at him some more.

“You’re not serious.”

“I am.” Tugger insisted. “Very serious in fact.”

“But…” Quaxo swallowed and tried again. “But you’re you… and I’ m just… me.”

Tugger gave a little pained whine. “You’re not _just_ anything. Quaxo… I… Bast, I don’t know how to explain this but I’ve always thought you were the most interesting cat in London. I kept my distance after realising how I felt at the ball because I didn’t want to overwhelm you, which I’ve clearly gone and done anyway, or pressure you into anything. You used to do anything I told you to and I didn’t want you to go along with something just because you wanted to please me.

And I know my… lifestyle… might leave something to be desired but I promise it’s only because I couldn’t have who I actually wanted and because they weren’t you. I know it might be hard to believe that I could go without sex, but if that’s the only sort of relationship I could have with you then I’d abstain gladly. Of course if you don’t want that and just want to pretend that we never had this conversation I understand. I can do that. I promise I can… or at least I promise that I’ll try. I might have to keep my distance for a while but I’ll get there, and-”

“Tugger.”

Tugger looked up at him.

“What is it you want exactly?”

“You, of course.”

Quaxo blinked teary eyes. “Yes but… like… _how_ do you want me?”

“In any way you’ll let me have you.” Tugger whispered back.

Quaxo sobbed then as he threw his arms around the large tom’s neck. Tugger quickly enveloped him, wrapping his arms as far around the black and white cat as he could get them and pulling him into his lap. Quaxo continued to sob, though some of it might also have been disbelieving laughter as well as their tails twined together. He rubbed his runny nose into Tugger’s mane and the older tom didn’t object, just caressed at his back as he purred reassuringly.

Quaxo pulled back suddenly, wiping at his cheeks and nose to dry them as he reach out incredulously to touch Tugger’s own, a dopey smile shining through.

“You’re serious?” He asked, needing the reassurance.

“I’m not sure I’ve ever been so serious about anything in my life.” Tugger gave him a tiny, uncertain smile, hope beginning to dawn on his face.

Quaxo grinned widely at him. “I… Ha! _The_ Rum Tum Tugger is in _love_ with _me_.”

“Yeah, I am.”

Quaxo threw his head back and laughed, still soundly in the other cats lap. He buried one paw in Tugger’s mane as he caressing Tugger’s now smiling face with the other.

“I’m going to take it that you’re ok with that then?” Tugger asked hopefully.

Quaxo gazed back at him, realising that he’d left the other tom hanging. His grin softened as he stroked at Tugger’s jaw. “Yeah. Yeah I’m ok with that. More than ok.”

Tugger let out a breath before kissing him hard on the mouth, pulling back just far enough to whisper, “Oh thank Bast.”

Quaxo giggle, leaning his forehead against Tugger’s with a dopey grin plastered all over his face. “So…”

“So.”

“So what now?” Quaxo asked, running his claws lightly through the back of Tugger’s mane.

“I guess we just keep on.” Tugger replied, as a purr rumbled in his chest. “I mean I’ve been treating you how I’ve always wanted to treat out for the last couple of days anyway. I mean I’ll probably be more annoying about it now, because I know you actually want it too but… it’ll be similar.”

“So we just let people go one believing we’ve been together this whole time? Even though we’ve only got together now?”

Tugger’s grin grew impossibly wider. “Are we together now?”

Quaxo huffed and gave him a small shove. “Yes, we’re together now. I hope you’re prepared to deal with that.”

“I would very much like to deal with that.” Tugger replied, rubbing his nose against Quaxo’s. “In fact, I hope I never stop having to deal with it.”

Quaxo purred in response, pressing himself into Tugger’s fur more. “I’d like that too.”

“Good.” Tugger sighed, closing his eyes and laying his head on Quaxo’s shoulder. “Everlasting cat. I’d actually convince myself that this wasn’t a possibility. That you’d never feel the same. Not after I basically abandoned you as a kit.”

Quaxo rubbed his face into Tugger’s neck. “It’s ok. I forgive you. I understand more now I think. And… well the sex thing might have to wait a while. Or maybe we can build up to it? Because I definitely want to do that just… not quite yet. I don’t know, the whole idea is a bit intimidating, especially considering your previous experience and-”

“Quaxo,” Tugger pulled back to look at him.

“What?”

“When… when I asked you if you’d had sexual thoughts about anyone and you said you had but refused to tell me who... were you…?”

“Yeah. I was talking about you, idiot.”

Tugger let out a long breath as another disbelieving smile spread across his face. “Thank Bast, because when you asked if there was anyone who I might want more than just sex with and I dodged the question, I was one hundred percent thinking of you.”

Quaxo giggled. Like actually giggle. Like one of the kittens in Tugger’s fan club, and Quaxo suddenly understood the heady feeling that Tugger’s attention must give them. Tugger just grinned back, still holding him tightly in his lap, Quaxo’s knees bracketing his hips.

So they sat there, grinning at each other like complete idiots for a good long while.

“I suppose we should try to get some sleep.” Tugger suggested some time later.

“Yeah, good luck,” Quaxo joked, “I don’t think I could sleep if my life depended on it.”

“Hmm,” Tugger hummed in agreement. “Wanna go look at the stars?”

Quaxo’s ears perked up instantly. “Yeah, ok.”

The tuxedo tom clambered out of his lap awkwardly. Tugger pushed himself upright crouch first and Quaxo didn’t know whether to laugh, roll his eyes or blush furiously. Instead he looked away quickly, much to Tugger’s amusement.

“You’re allowed to look Quaxo,” Tugger said with a grin as they started for the door, “In fact I encourage you to look. I’d love for you to look. Look all you want. All. The. Time.”

Quaxo shook his head as Tugger lent over from behind him to pull the curtain back for him. Quaxo gave him a quick smile before jumping down out of the den. He felt rather then saw Tugger follow and then there was a warm paw on his lower back, guiding him across the tire and towards the old shipping container.

Munkustrap, who was standing on the car keeping watch, gave them a curious look but didn’t comment as Tugger nodded to him.

The shipping container was a lot easier to climb up onto now that he wasn’t the size of a large mouse. Quaxo hadn’t been up here since he was a kit and he’d forgotten how cold the metal got at night. Thankfully as he turned to help Tugger up he discovered that the Maine coon had a blanket draped over one shoulder, clearly having foreseen the problem. Of course it was a horrendous lime green thing but at least it looked thick.

It was a clear night, which of course meant that it was rather chilly, but that had never stopped them as kits so why should it now?

Tuger quickly laid out the blanket, doubling it over so it was twice the thickness, and then held Quaxo’s paw as they both sat down. Tugger quickly pulled Quaxo back into his stomach, so he was half draped over Quaxo’s back like a ridiculous cape, resting his chin against his shoulder again like he had that afternoon. Tugger rubbed up and down his arms quickly and Quaxo realised he was trying to get him warm. It was beginning to dawn on Quaxo that maybe Tugger was a much more thoughtful cat then any of them gave him credit for.

Quaxo smiled, turning his head to the side to nuzzle at his cheek. “Did I just inherit a cat shaped hot water bottle?”

“Well someone’s got to keep you warm cause your coat does a shit poor job of it.” Tugger replied, finally stopping his rubbed and wrapping his arms around his middle instead.

“Pfft, rude.”

Quaxo felt Tugger’s chest vibrate as he laughed. “Yep, that’s me.”

Quaxo lent back against his shoulder and looked up at the night sky. Quaxo had gotten really good at spotting constellations when he was a kit but now he couldn’t find almost any of them. Well besides Orion and the Great Bear.

“Quaxo?”

“Yeah?” Quaxo replied, still gazing up at the expanse of stars.

“I was thinking, maybe you’d want to move in with me?” Tugger suggest nervously.

Quaxo looked at him. “Won’t Munk have something to say about that?”

“Oh I don’t think he’ll mind,” Tugger said quickly, “not once I explain that we’re not actually having sex.”

“Yeah but we might… eventually… at least I might like to have the option.”

“Well then we find our own den, but you’ll have somewhere to sleep in the meantime.” Tugger replied, “and I thought… I thought maybe Munk would be a good buffer… like his presence would stop you from feeling like I expected anything from you in that department.

Quaxo couldn’t help but purr, even now Tugger was trying to prevent him from feeling pressured into doing anything. He turned, closing his eyes and waiting. It took Tugger a moment to catch on but when he did he did so enthusiastically.

Pressing his lips against Quaxo’s firmly, Tugger cradled the back of his neck gently and happily accepted the affection. It didn’t allude Quaxo that this was their first real kiss as a couple, though now that he knew how Tugger felt he also knew that he hadn’t been faking any of the affection he’d shown Quaxo over the last few days. He’d probably come up with the fake relationship idea just so he’d have an excuse to kiss him.

And that first kiss. The intensity of it was a sneak peak of what would come, and Quaxo wanted that. Maybe not this second but he definitely wanted it.

They came apart gently and the glow on Tugger’s face could have powered London.

“The older cats used to tell me,” Tugger started, looking dazed, “that things would be different once I found someone to settle down with. That everything was better when there were feelings involved and not just sex. I used to laugh and tell them that just needed to get laid. Don’t tell anyone this, because I’ll deny it to the ends of the earth if you do, but they might have been right.”

Quaxo laughed. “You’re such an idiot.”

“Naw, love you too, little one.”

Quaxo sighed with an amused smile and relaxed back into him. “Yeah. I love you too.”


End file.
